He Has Risen

Brothers and sisters, can I get an amen?!

News broke Monday that the Jacksonville Jaguars are planning on signing Tim Tebow.

The Philippine-born former quarterback will once again take his talents to the NFL. The connection here, as noted by Ian Rapoport, is that the recently retired minor league baseball player’s college coach, noted jagoff Urban Meyer, is now running the show in Jacksonville.

Our prayers have been answered. Praise be to the higher power bringing Tim Tebow back into the professional sports galaxy for what will either be his sixteenth or seventeenth chance. We will all once again be baptized by Tebow-mania and blessed by sports debate shows arguing if Tebow can perform the miracle of transitioning from a quarterback to a tight end.

The football world has gone celibate of Tim Tebow for far too long; and that chastity belt is about to be busted wide open. Fans everywhere have kept the faith, for over 3,000 days, that one day our angel would descend from the clouds, throw on his shoulder pads, and once again be reincarnated as a professional football player.

It is going to be a sight to see every palm Sunday in Jacksonville this season. With Tebow’s career resurrected, every day feels like the sabbath once again. We as football fans can finally rest, part the sea of pillows on the couch, and tune into some Jacksonville Jaguars football.

This must be what heaven feels like.

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