The Bengals Dropped Their New Uniforms Today and We are Again Fashion Critics

The Cincinnati Bengals had their most exciting day in years Monday as they dropped their latest revamped uniforms. Southwest Ohio was abuzz when their beloved football team, who has suffered double-digit losses in 14 of their last 30 seasons, unveiled the latest threads they’ll be rocking in 2021 and beyond. Let’s break these bad boys down (all photos from Bengals.com).

Helmet

Eh…this an L.

Total missed opportunity to go back to the old school helmet with “Bengals” text written across the helmet. We’re going to have to live with the same old stripes while we watch Joe Burrow throw for 7,000 yards, 40 touchdowns and drag his team to six wins a year for the foreseeable future.

Jersey

Pants


Overall a good, not great uniform update for the proverbial AFC North cellar dwellers. The biggest win here was having Ochocino being a part of this whole project. I’ve always been a believer in the “look good feel good, feel good play good” moniker. If there’s any real credence to that claim, these uniforms may just make Vegas move the Bengals 2021 current win total from 6.5 to 7.5 in a hurry.

Sunday State of Mind: April 12th-April 18th

Sports gave us another week full of entertainment, enjoyment, and great moments. We look back in this week’s SSM.

Trevor Lawrence had himself a rough week
People thought his love for football looked bleak
Nothing’s going to change, he’ll still go number one
The top of this month’s draft is all but done

Another bad football story, about a man that’s large
Aaron Donald caught himself a false assault charge
After the initial statement, the accuser took it back
A quick and fair solution, did not get out of whack

The New York Yankees, not showing face
Through 15 games, sitting in last place
Just like the poor Tigers, Pirates, and Braves
Yanks better start moving before the season caves

March 9th Was a Weird Day for Allen Robinson

Photo: Flipboard

March 9th. Maybe one of the most mundane dates on the calendar. The doldrums of winter are slowly creeping to an end. Daylight Savings Time is a few days away. Snow is still on the ground, but the end is in sight.

For Chicago Bears wide receiver Allen Robinson, March 9th was a weird one. Robinson, who had 1,250 yards and 6 touchdowns last year, was franchise-tagged on Tuesday. The Bears top receiving threat will get a $3 million dollar raise in 2021, making $18 million this coming year.

Apparently, $18 million isn’t enough for A-Rob, as it appears he has taken up a new career outside of being a top-flight NFL wide receiver, NBA insider:

That’s right. The same Allen Robinson who hauls in touchdowns in Chicago (for now) is infiltrating the NBA news breaking game. Robinson has sources, and he’s using them.

Andre Drummond is one of the biggest names potentially be on the move in the NBA; but that’s not the story here. The story is an NFL wide receiver spreading his wings and taking on Woj, Shams, and anyone else who wants that NBA news breaking smoke.

I hope Robinson nails this scoop, continues to drop bombs on Twitter, and becomes the newest NBA source that we can rely on for our inside information.

Sunday State of Mind: February 22nd-February 28th

We have finally reached the end of a brutal February. What happened in sports during the last week of this snow-filled month? We recap in this week’s SSM.

A single car wreck rocked the golf universe
Tiger Woods’ accident luckily could have been worse
Today we had a nice tribute after a week full of dread
Golfers at the Workday Championship, wearing Sunday Tiger Red

Rooting for a guy who has been through absolute hell
Teammates once again with Johnny Manziel
Another chapter in the Josh Gordon story
A hopeful step to a return to NFL glory

Bryce Harper came to Spring Training with a hot take for all
He says the NL East “is the best division in baseball”
Top to bottom he may be right, the division is a beast
What about the other league? An argument for the AL East?

The Minnesota Timberwolves’ season looking bleak
As of this weekend they’re on a seven game losing streak
In a long and loss-filled season, someone has to give them shine
Unfortunately for the ‘Wolves, plenty more losses down the line

On the other side of the spectrum, the Nets won eight in a row
Their last win came on Thursday when they beat up on Orlando
But the Mavs came into Brooklyn, and the win streak was no more
Dallas took it to Brooklyn, 115-98 was the final score

Who Wore it Best? 99-90

Photo: Dr. Odd

We’re kicking off a new series; and we’re going by the numbers. This countdown is dedicated to the best players of all-time by each jersey number. No concrete formula here, just career stats, impact on the game, and some good old fashion opinion. Let’s hop right in.

99 – Wayne Gretzky

Photo: LA Biz

He’s called “The Great One” for a reason. Hard to pick a favorite stat to demonstrate Gretzky’s dominance, but one of my favorites is that if he never scored a goal, he still would have had 11 straight 100-point seasons and won four scoring titles.

Honorable Mentions: Manny Ramirez, George Mikan, Warren Sapp

98 – Casey Hampton

Not a widely popular number, so not our largest name on the list. Appropriately nicknamed “Big Snacks,” Hampton made five Pro Bowls as the Steelers nose tackle in the early aughts.

Honorable Mentions: Jason Collins

97 – Jeremy Roenick

Maybe not the best guy, but a pretty good hockey player. The eighth overall pick in the 1988 NHL draft scored 1,216 points in 1,363 games played.

Honorable Mentions: Bryant Young, Cam Heyward

96 – Cortez Kennedy

Kennedy recorded 58 sacks in his 11 seasons for the Seahawks. He recorded 569 tackles and 11 forced fumbles.

Honorable Mentions: Metta World Peace, Tomas Holmstrom

95 – Richard Dent

A bonafide Hall of Famer who was a part of one of the greatest defenses of all time, the ’85 Bears. What more can you ask for?

Honorable Mentions: N/A

94 – Charles Haley

The defensive centerpiece of two all-time franchises in the Cowboys and 49ers.

Honorable Mention: Demarcus Ware

93 – John Randle

Anyone who goes undrafted in their respective sport and go on to become a Hall of Famer is good enough for this list. Randle made seven Pro Bowls and was a six time first team All-Pro selection en route to Canton.

Honorable Mentions: Pat Neshak, Metta World Peace

92 – Reggie White

Photo: Quotes Gram

“The Minister of Defense” was one of the greatest free agent signings of all time, when he left the Philadelphia Eagles in 1992 and signed with the Green Bay Packers. He finished his career with 198 sacks, two NFL defensive player of the year awards, and a Super Bowl ring.

Honorable Mentions: DeShawn Stevenson, Gabriel Landeskog

91 – Dennis Rodman

An obvious answer for a surprisingly strong number. But Rodman’s five rings, seven NBA All-Defensive first selections, and nearly 12,000 career rebounds puts him on our list.

Honorable Mentions: Kevin Greene, Sergei Fedorov

90 – Ndamukong Suh

Suh has had a late-career number change to 93, but he donned 90 early in his career for the Lions when he was arguable at his best. During his time rocking the big 9-0, Suh was the NFL Rookie of the Year, made four Pro Bowls, and was a three time NFL First Team All-Pro.

Honorable Mention: Ryan O’Reilly

High numbers, a lot of hockey players and defensive lineman, to be expected. Will we have some different sports and positions represented in our next set of jersey numbers, 89-80? Only time will tell.

From Geno’s to St. Elmo; Carson Wentz Stakes His Claim as QB1 in Indianapolis

Photo: Malik Wright on Twitter

Carson Wentz, once thought of as the savior of the Philadelphia Eagles, has been traded to the Indianapolis Colts. The trade is just another in a juicy offseason full of flavorful moves rarely seen in the NFL.

Wentz rose to prominence as the quarterback of the NDSU Bison in college, a perennial FCS powerhouse. He shot up the draft boards and became the second overall pick in the 2016 NFL Draft, right behind Jared Goff, who was also traded this offseason for Matthew Stafford.

Wentz has always been a real meat and potatoes guy, a hunter through and through. The gamey quarterback seemed to be the perfect garnish on top of the Eagles organization in his first two years, throwing for nearly 50 touchdowns, and being named a second-team All-Pro in 2017.

After that, it seemed like NFL defenses cured their Wentz issue, and the quarterback was cooked. Opposing defensive coordinators started peppering Wentz with different looks and schemes, and he got smoked.

In the last three seasons, he only won 17 games. His completion percentage became more and more thinly-sliced each year; going from a career-high 69.6% in 11 games in 2018, to a career-worst 57.4% in 12 games last season.

How a career that started off with so much sizzle has dried up so quickly is hard to fathom. It appeared Wentz was braised with all of the physical and mental skills needed to be a top-flight quarterback. The way he has butchered his on field performance the past few years has been wildly surprising.

A fresh start with a new organization may be just what he needs to get lean on the bad play, find some organic success, and become that prime quarterback he was his first few years in the NFL.

Sunday State of Mind: February 8th-February 14th

Happy Valentines Day! A holiday associated with poetry is a perfect time to drop this week’s SSM.

The Tampa Bay Bucs had their Super Bowl parade
Appeared the entire team was drinking vodka lemonade
The visuals from the entire day were just so great
Who says no to next year Brady getting number eight?

The Houston Texans have released JJ Watt
An organization in flux, change happening a lot
A formerly great offense, and that defense was mean
Next year looks like it’s trending towards 0-16

The Cubs and Jake Arrieta are running it back
The Cy Young winner, rejoining the pack
In a rotation that’s lacking, Jake could be a guide
And stabilize a weakness next year on the North Side

We got old school Melo this week, absolutely silly
Sixteen fourth quarter points in a win against Philly
Carmelo had 24 points as the Blazers sixth man
Portland fifth in the West, things going to plan

Sunday State of Mind: February 1st-February 7th

Photo: The Wow Style

Super Bowl Sunday, what a rollercoaster. The excitement of the biggest game of the year and just like that…the season’s over. We take it quarter by quarter in this week’s SSM.

Bit of a slow first quarter, 7-3
Big play was the first Brady to Gronk TD
Would the early deficit have the Chiefs feeling blue?
Let’s move our recap on, to quarter number two

Second quarter, guess who?
Brady to Gronk, TD number two!
Bucs looked good and were rolling at half
Brady beating Mahomes, the old bull vs. the young calf

Third quarter, more Bucs, Tampa kept adding on
Bucs looking like kings, Chiefs looking like pawns
Fournette got in on the touchdown party
Bucs showed up on time, Chiefs showed up tardy

We all saw it coming from the jump
Tom Brady and the Bucs get over the hump
Another incredible chapter in the Tom Brady story
For the seventh time, TB12 hoists the Lombardi Trophy

Sunday State of Mind: January 25th-January 31st

Photo: wallup.net

If you’re reading this in the midwest, you’re likely experiencing apocalyptic snow. Grab a blanket, stay inside, and enjoy this week’s SSM.

A blockbuster trade in the NFL
A rare sight indeed, a cold day in hell
Jared Goff and Matt Stafford, a quarterback swap
The Rams on their way to the NFC’s hilltop

Another big name on the move this week
Nolan Arenado to Cardinals, Card fans freak
Nolan does have an opt out option after 2021
The NL Central hoping he’s one and done

The Brooklyn Nets have won four in a row
After a slightly slow start, the big three on a roll
They’re scoring 126 points per game during this recent hot streak
Unless you’re Philly or Milwaukee, in the East it looks bleak

Is the NFL Making Decisions Based On Content From Untimed Down Sports?

It’s a question that needs to be asked.

This week, the NFL announced that inaugural poet laureate Amanda Gorman would be performing an original poem before the Super Bowl. According to HuffPost, Gorman will “perform a poem honoring the three people tapped by the league to serve as honorary captains for the Super Bowl this year…[t]he trio consists of nurse Suzie Dorner, educator Trimaine Davis and Marine Corps veteran James Martin.”

Now, no matter which way you lean, it’s hard to downplay how great Ms. Gorman’s poem, and the reading of said poem, was on Inauguration Day. Even if you didn’t like it, our poet laureate has the resumé to shut pretty much any of us down. According to her website, theamandagorman.com, Gorman is the youngest inaugural poet in U.S. history, graduated cum laude from Harvard, and has performed for the White House and Lin Manuel Miranda.

Great move by Commissioner Roger Goodell and the NFL here, incorporating poetry with the sports.

But wait a minute…hasn’t someone else been doing this for a while now? Bringing prose and pros together to spin a story involving athletics is one dynamic idea. Where did the NFL get this idea? That’s right…

FROM US.

Whether you’ve been rocking with UDS from day one or just started checking us out a week ago, you would have noticed our weekly recurring series, Sunday State of Mind. We take the week that was in sports and recap it with truly, truly awful rhyme schemes and wording that would make real poets like Amanda Gorman question the art form of poetry itself. You can read some examples of our exemplary work here, here, and here.

This has nothing to do with Amanda Gorman, who has more talent in per pinky finger than most other writers today. Totally innocent in all of this; who wouldn’t want to perform at the Super Bowl?

All I’m saying is…we’ve been on this sports poetry tip for a while. All of the sudden the NFL comes barging in and totally jocking our schtick by incorporating one of the country’s best poets into the biggest game of the year? I’m calling shenanigans. I see through it, Goodell, and I just want you to know that.