What If NBA Trades Were Clothing Items? Untimed Down’s NBA Trade Deadline Special

Photo: NBA.com

Deadline Day in the NBA has come and gone. With it, countless useless names moving from city to city that will have little to no impact on anything.

BUT, there are a few moves every year that draw interest. For every Daniel Thies or George Hill there’s a Pau Gasol or Carmelo Anthony. This year was no different; the league was dressed head to toe with deadline deals.

Another trade deadline day for the league with the most fashion forward athletes did not disappoint. With that in mind, what would some of the trades we saw today be if they were clothing items?

Kings/Bucks/Clippers/Pistons: Donte DiVincenzo, Trey Lyles, Josh Jackson, Serge Ibaka, two second round picks, Rodney Hood, Semi Ojele, Marvin Bagley III:

Rainbow Toe Socks

Photo: The Socks Emporium

A lot going on for something that is essentially useless.

It doesn’t really matter which players are ending up where in this deal. Just an absolute assembly of disarray happening here for a considerable amount of impracticability.

Mavericks/Wizards: Kristaps Porzingas for Spencer Dinwiddie:

Propeller Hat

Photo: CGTrader

These have to be two of the funnest names to say in the NBA; and they were traded for each other.

Spencer Dinwiddie sounds like a cartoon protagonist from a 90’s Nickelodeon show. Kristaps Porzingas sounds like a sommelier who takes his job way too seriously.

Just fun all around.

Nets/76ers: James Harden for Ben Simmons, Seth Curry, Andre Drummond and two first round picks

Fleece Sweatshirt

Photo: Russell Athletic

Look at those names above. The Nets gave up an aging forward who can’t stay in once place for too long and got a superstar point guard, a three point sniper, a top five rebounder, and reloaded on draft picks.

There’s nothing else to say here; the 76ers got fleeced.

One more year of Woj bombs and Shams slams at their peak deadline day performance. Now we have the buyout market, and a flurry of other big name moves that likely won’t change anything down the stretch either. This league!

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