Happy Father’s Day! Read this week’s SSM to Dad since he was probably napping in his recliner during all the action.
Madden 22 has released their latest cover Two goats, one game, great for football lovers Brady and Mahomes are your newest cover boys On the video game that has given all of us years of joy
Spider Tack introduced itself into the public eye MLB cares all the sudden, truly wonder why No chance that it could be because batting’s now a joke Anything they can do to fix a sport that’s nearly broke
Suns and the Clippers, finals in the West Phoenix and LA going to see who is the best Bucks advanced in the East to face the 76ers or Hawks Philly or Atlanta in game seven, loser has to walk
Not a huge field of choices here, but a nice selection. Jared Allen played for the Chiefs, Vikings, Bears, and Panthers during an above-average 11 year NFL career. He made First Team All-Pro four times, lead the NFL twice in sacks, and made five Pro Bowls.
The flow is enough to be included on our list. That head lettuce is a thing of beauty. Jagr wasn’t half bad in his 24 seasons in professional hockey either: most career game winning goals (135), five Art Ross trophies, and two Stanley Cups.
Remember this guy? Cordova gets the nod for pitching nine innings in a what ended up being a 10 inning no hitter for the Pirates against the Astros on June 12, 1997.
Surprisingly strong category here at 66. Lemieux takes it home as one of the best hockey players to ever do it. In fact, Lemieux and Wayne Gretzky are the only two players who occupy the list of top ten seasons for points and assists in a season. Pretty impressive company to keep.
Paxton may very well end up being the youngest athlete to make our list. However, “Big Maple” has earned his spot at 65 for recording a no-hitter for the Mariners in 2018.
McDaniel was a stalwart offensive guard for 13 seasons, mostly with the Vikings. McDaniel started 220 of his career 222 games, made 12 Pro Bowls, and is a member of NFL 100th Anniversary All-Time Team.
Another hard nosed, badass, old school NFL lineman. Upshaw played 14 years for the Raiders, scooping up three First Team All-Pro selections, five Second Team All-Pro selections, and two Super Bowl rings.
Jim Langer was the center for the only undefeated team in NFL history, the 1972 Dolphins. Langer won two Super Bowls and was a three time First Team All-Pro.
Who else loved this absolute unit growing up? His career numbers aren’t stellar, but anyone who can hang around the majors for 17 seasons is impressive. Hernandez is a two time All-Star who won a ring as well as World Series MVP honors with the Marlins in 1997.
Not a lot of meat on the 60 bone, but a fine choice here. Keuchel has established himself as one of the steadiest pitchers in baseball since entering the bigs with the Astros in 2012. He has won four Gold Gloves, the 2015 Cy Young, and a World Series ring in 2017.
Honorable Mention: N/A
Another edition of “Who Wore It Best,” done and dusted. Nice representative spread in the the 60’s for football, hockey, and baseball. Total choke job from basketball here; maybe we’ll see some stronger effort in the 50’s?
Loud suits, awkward bear hugs, and dreams coming true. The NFL Draft comes around every April and becomes a bigger spectacle every year. Seeing these mutant freak athletes break down and hug mom or family when their name is called never fails to deliver.
On Thursday, we got our annual helping of all of the feels, Roger Godell being weird, and grainy war room footage when the NFL started the clock on their 2021 Draft. Some picks were locks, some were surprises, and we were there for all of it.
1. Trevor Lawrence, QB, Jacksonville Jaguars: more like Trevor Snorerence, amirite? This pick was made the day Lawrence declared he was leaving Clemson and going to the NFL.
2. Zach Wilson, QB, New York Jets: a small town millennial moves to the big city after college; will he survive or succumb to the pressures of professional life in New York? Turns out it wasn’t the destination that was important, but the journey along the way. Sounds like a rom-com in the making.
3. Trey Lance, QB, San Francisco 49ers: drafting a QB who has barely played in college, what could go wrong?
4. Kyle Pitts, TE, Atlanta Falcons: despite having a god awful defense, you can’t blame the Falcons for drafting a guy that could very well be the best player in this draft fourth overall.
5. Ja’Marr Chase, WR, Cincinnati Bengals: yeah, no, Joe Burrow doesn’t need a left tackle, he’s fine.
6. Jaylen Waddle, WR, Miami Dolphins: Jaylen careens, dodders, and staggers his way to South Beach.
7. Penei Sewell, OT, Detroit Lions:“Dantallica” has his left tackle, now he just needs a quarterback.
8. Jaycee Horn, CB, Carolina Panthers: this kid has to be good if he came from the loins of the man responsible for one of the greatest celebrations of all time.
9. Patrick Surtain II, CB, Denver Broncos: Surtain’s dad was a stud in Madden 2004, so the kid has to be good right?
10. DeVonta Smith, WR, Philadelphia Eagles: fun fact: Smith’s Heisman Trophy is heavier than DeVonta himself.
11. Justin Fields, QB, Chicago Bears: not here to make a joke about the Bears trading up for a quarterback…that’s old, played out, and I already did it earlier on the Trey Lance pick.
12. Micah Parsons, LB, Dallas Cowboys: Jerr-uh Jones, human embodiment of The Rich Texan from The Simpsons, rangles himself up another solid linebacker.
13. Rashawn Slater, OT, Los Angeles Chargers: Slater gets the best of both worlds; he gets to live in LA and won’t have the pressure of fans showing up to games to boo him if he struggles.
14. Alijah Vera-Tucker, G, New York Jets: the Jets pledge their Alija-nce to their new QB Zach Wilson, by getting him some protection in Vera-Tucker.
15. Mac Jones, QB, New England Patriots: I now have no doubt that Mac Jones will become the greatest quarterback to ever play the game.
16. Zaven Collins, LB, Arizona Cardinals: the worst part about this pick is that we didn’t get a sneak peak into Kliff Kingsbury’s sexy bachelor pad like we did last year.
17. Alex Leatherwood, OT, Las Vegas Raiders: can you imagine the culture shock of moving from Tuscaloosa, Alabama to Las Vegas?
18. Jaelan Phillips, DE, Miami Dolphins: very cool story here; this guy went from retiring in college to a first round pick.
19. Jamin Davis, LB, Washington Football Team: The Washington Football Team picked a football player to play for their football team…football.
20. Kadarius Toney, WR, New York Giants: men with that namesake in the greater New York metropolitan area always take care of business…great pick here by the G-Men.
21. Kwity Paye, DE, Indianapolis Colts: Jim Irsay, as he is known to do, focuses on the line.
22. Caleb Farley, CB, Tennessee Titans: the fact that I get duped into thinking this is Chris Farley anytime I read this guy’s name makes me hate this pick.
23. Christian Darrisaw, OT, Minnesota Vikings: another devout Christian on the Vikings offense.
24. Najee Harris, RB, Pittsburgh Steelers: stop me if you’ve heard this before: “Alabama player drafted in the first round.”
25. Travis Etienne, RB, Jacksonville Jaguars: just like the 2019 Masters, Tigers back in Jacksonville.
26. Greg Newsome II, CB, Cleveland Browns: the second first rounder from Northwestern…what the hell is going on?
27. Rashod Bateman, WR, Baltimore Ravens: Bateman’s quarterback in college looks like he’s twice the age of Lamar Jackson…so he’s got that going for him, which is nice.
28. Payton Turner, DE, New Orleans Saints: Turner’s first name breaks down to “big pay day.” Good things in the future for this guy.
29. Eric Stokes, CB, Green Bay Packers: an inspired pick that will for sure distract all of us from the Aaron Rodgers news.
30. Gregory Rousseau, DE, Buffalo Bills: this dude definitely looks like he could go through some tables.
31. Jayson Oweh, LB, Baltimore Ravens: this guys last name sounds like a surprised Canadian.
32. Joe Tryon, LB, Tampa Bay Buccaneers: some pass rush ability for this prospect, but a definite raw talent. The Super Bowl champs are going to take a flyer and try on the linebacker from Washington.
It was a glorious night for the above-mentioned 32 players and their families. After all of the pomp and circumstance of draft night one, it really makes me want to time warp to Week 1 in the fall. Rounds 2-7 will have to do for now.
Round two of who wore it best is here. We’re ranking the GOAT to wear each jersey number. If you missed part one for jersey numbers 99-90, check it out here. For now, let’s dive into numbers 89-80.
Everyone knows Ditka lead the Bears to their only Super Bowl in ’85. Did you know on the field he was a five time Pro Bowler, first team all-pro four times, and was the rookie of the year in 1961? Ditka also has the number 89 retired for both the Bears and at the University of Pittsburgh.
STRONG number here. Kaner takes the crown as a sure fire Hall of Famer with three Stanley Cups, the 2013 Conn Smythe trophy, and nine all-star selections.
Honorable Mentions: Albert Belle, Antoine Walker, Michael Irvin, Allan Page
Slim pickings at number 86. Antonio Freeman had a respectable NFL career; in 1998 he led the NFL in receiving yards, was named to the Pro Bowl, and was named first team All-Pro. He also tacked on a Super Bowl win in the 96-97 season.
Kittle hasn’t been in the NFL for too long, but has already done some serious damage. In three and a half seasons (he only played eight games in 2020), Kittle has made two Pro Bowls, was a first team All-Pro in 2019, and has racked up 3,579 yards and 14 touchdowns.
One of the best athletes to ever play wide receiver. Moss has unreal runs with the Vikings from 98-04 and Patriots from 07-10. He lead the NFL in touchdowns in five different seasons, was a four time first team All-Pro, and is a member of the NFL 100th Anniversary All-Time Team.
Unreal bad luck for Wes Welker that he played six seasons with Tom Brady and two with Peyton Manning and has exactly zero Super Bowl rings. He did however revolutionize the slot receiver position, collecting two first team All-Pro selections and leading the NFL in receptions in 2007, 2009, and 2011.
Ozzie Newsome was one of the first tight ends to stretch the field; he paved the way for the Gronks, Kelces, and Ertzs of the world that we see in the NFL today. He is a member of the Browns Ring of Honor, bringing in 662 catches, almost 8,000 yards, and 47 touchdowns during his career.
Our second Blackhawk to crack the list. Hossa was a huge part of the Chicago’s three Stanley Cups in the 2010’s. He also was named to the All-Rookie team in 1999 and made five All-Star games.
No doubter here; the original GOAT. The career accomplishments are almost embarrassing: three Super Bowls, ten first team All-Pro, 13 Pro Bowls, member of the 75th and 100th NFL Anniversary Teams, and first team All-80’s and All-90’s Teams. Rice’s career stats are also zany: 1,549 catches, 23,546 yards, and 208 touchdowns.
Honorable Mention: N/A
Heavy football and hockey vibes in this edition. We’ll crack into the 70’s in our next edition of Who Wore It Best.
Happy Valentines Day! A holiday associated with poetry is a perfect time to drop this week’s SSM.
The Tampa Bay Bucs had their Super Bowl parade Appeared the entire team was drinking vodka lemonade The visuals from the entire day were just so great Who says no to next year Brady getting number eight?
The Houston Texans have released JJ Watt An organization in flux, change happening a lot A formerly great offense, and that defense was mean Next year looks like it’s trending towards 0-16
The Cubs and Jake Arrieta are running it back The Cy Young winner, rejoining the pack In a rotation that’s lacking, Jake could be a guide And stabilize a weakness next year on the North Side
We got old school Melo this week, absolutely silly Sixteen fourth quarter points in a win against Philly Carmelo had 24 points as the Blazers sixth man Portland fifth in the West, things going to plan
Super Bowl Sunday, what a rollercoaster. The excitement of the biggest game of the year and just like that…the season’s over. We take it quarter by quarter in this week’s SSM.
Bit of a slow first quarter, 7-3 Big play was the first Brady to Gronk TD Would the early deficit have the Chiefs feeling blue? Let’s move our recap on, to quarter number two
Second quarter, guess who? Brady to Gronk, TD number two! Bucs looked good and were rolling at half Brady beating Mahomes, the old bull vs. the young calf
Third quarter, more Bucs, Tampa kept adding on Bucs looking like kings, Chiefs looking like pawns Fournette got in on the touchdown party Bucs showed up on time, Chiefs showed up tardy
We all saw it coming from the jump Tom Brady and the Bucs get over the hump Another incredible chapter in the Tom Brady story For the seventh time, TB12 hoists the Lombardi Trophy
This week, the NFL announced that inaugural poet laureate Amanda Gorman would be performing an original poem before the Super Bowl. According to HuffPost, Gorman will “perform a poem honoring the three people tapped by the league to serve as honorary captains for the Super Bowl this year…[t]he trio consists of nurse Suzie Dorner, educator Trimaine Davis and Marine Corps veteran James Martin.”
Now, no matter which way you lean, it’s hard to downplay how great Ms. Gorman’s poem, and the reading of said poem, was on Inauguration Day. Even if you didn’t like it, our poet laureate has the resumé to shut pretty much any of us down. According to her website, theamandagorman.com, Gorman is the youngest inaugural poet in U.S. history, graduated cum laude from Harvard, and has performed for the White House and Lin Manuel Miranda.
Great move by Commissioner Roger Goodell and the NFL here, incorporating poetry with the sports.
But wait a minute…hasn’t someone else been doing this for a while now? Bringing prose and pros together to spin a story involving athletics is one dynamic idea. Where did the NFL get this idea? That’s right…
FROM US.
Whether you’ve been rocking with UDS from day one or just started checking us out a week ago, you would have noticed our weekly recurring series, Sunday State of Mind. We take the week that was in sports and recap it with truly, truly awful rhyme schemes and wording that would make real poets like Amanda Gorman question the art form of poetry itself. You can read some examples of our exemplary work here, here, and here.
This has nothing to do with Amanda Gorman, who has more talent in per pinky finger than most other writers today. Totally innocent in all of this; who wouldn’t want to perform at the Super Bowl?
All I’m saying is…we’ve been on this sports poetry tip for a while. All of the sudden the NFL comes barging in and totally jocking our schtick by incorporating one of the country’s best poets into the biggest game of the year? I’m calling shenanigans. I see through it, Goodell, and I just want you to know that.
NFL Championship Sunday is done, and the Super Bowl is set. We recap and look forward to Super Bowl LV in this week’s SSM.
Tampa and Green, the battle of the Bays Tom Brady just wins in so many ways Bucs are heading to their second Super Bowl One more win and they’ll accomplish their goal
The Kansas City Chiefs, what more can you say Andy Reid heading to another Super Bowl Sunday In today’s NFL, so hard to repeat Hard to imagine right now, the Chiefs getting beat
So the big game is set, Tampa Bay and Kansas City This match up, my God, the opposite of a pity TB12 and Mahomes, makes a fan feel alive Only two weeks away from Super Bowl 55
NFL Divisional Playoff weekend has come and gone. We’re here to wax poetic about it in this week’s SSM.
First game of the weekend, hosted by Green Bay The Packers really took it to the Rams of LA Aaron Rodgers continued his MVP run The Rams are headed home, back to the California sun
The Bills and Ravens in upstate New York Buffalo’s in the AFC Championship, pop the cork The Ravens fall again in the second round Someday soon Lamar will be Super Bowl bound
The Cleveland Browns had a nice playoff run But they met the Chiefs, and now they’re done Patrick Mahomes continues to roll If he beats the Bills, he’s off to another Super Bowl
Bucs and Saints, Tom Brady again Went down to New Orleans, came out with a win Brady vs. Rodgers next week, up in Lambeau All time QB matchup, who says no?
A truly wild story came out about Los Angeles Chargers quarterback Tyrod Taylor today. After coming out and warming up for their game on Sunday against the Chiefs, Taylor did not start the game. Rookie Justin Herbert made his NFL debut against the defending Super Bowl champions. This absence was simply not explained, only with the Chargers releasing an injury report stating Taylor had a chest injury.
Well…today we found out exactly what went down:
The Chargers’ team doctor accidentally punctured his own quarterback Tyrod Taylor’s lung just before kickoff Sunday while trying to administer a pain-killing injection to the quarterback’s cracked ribs, league and team sources told ESPN.
This is point blank ridiculous. A real stab in the heart. How does this team doctor implant himself into the Chargers staff, insert his medical “skills,” and almost kill the team’s starting quarterback?!
This doctor seems like a real prick. He needled his way into the position, had his shot, and administered a total screw up into Taylor’s lung. His forced administration of medical malfeasance can not stand, the team must interject.
A real skin crawling, forced issue for the Chargers and NFL. I truly hope this issue isn’t pushed aside, and that it causes all of us to shoot up and realize the importance of legitimate medical professionals to ensure the safety of our athletes. Feel better, Tyrod, and don’t be afraid to inject yourself into righting this wrong.
