Save for a few more games, the sports have completed their sportsing this weekend. Let’s look back together at all the happenings in this week’s SSM.
The Albert Pujols show, big episode this week
Joined the 700 club, not bad for an antique
He did it in style, two bombs out in LA
The Yankees home run record keeping Aaron Judge at bay
Tough week in Miami, The U indeed not back
MTSU came to town, Hurricanes blue and black
First year, new coach for the ‘canes, so this isn’t the end
Another upset like this though, things may just start to bend
TB12 and A-Rod, who’s your favorite old QB
On field goat debate, what a thing to see
Could not care less who won the game, what matters to us most
Was how the hell did a bee swarm end up on the goal post?
Colts and the Chiefs, thought this would be easy
By the end of the game Kansas City fans were queasy
Big upset for Indy, Matt Ryan won a big one
Tough loss for the Chiefs, Andy Reid had no fun
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Sunday State of Mind: September 5th-September 11th
We continue a longstanding tradition here at UDS by dedicating an entire SSM to Week One NFL action.
Big start on Thursday night, Rams and the Bills
Pregame program was legit, full of fluff and frills
The game was in LA, but plenty Bills fans there
Josh Allen and the boys came out and won the game with flair
Sunday start in the dirty, Falcons and the Saints
Start of football season, we have no complaints
Something so familiar, Falcons had an early lead
They coughed it up and lost, almost guaranteed
Browns and the Panthers, Baker revenge bowl
He wanted to win this game with his entire soul
Browns came out and played, got a surprising win
Panthers almost came back, there’s a positive spin
The San Francisco 49ers are used to good weather
The conditions in Chicago, they were different all together
It rained and rained and rained some more, really came down strong
A nice win for the Bears in a season that might be long
Steelers and the Bengals, an AFC North tilt
Bengals came in walking tall, like a man on stilts
Five turnovers for Joe Burrow, not like him at all
Even so, we had OT, but the Bengals did fall
Eagles and the Lions, closer than we expected!
Coming into the day, thought this game would be neglected
Lions got down early, then almost came back
Lot of money on the Eagles, banks almost attacked
Texans and the Colts, folks we have a tie
Same score in regulation, OT, and then the game died
Feels like a win for Houston, Indy can not be psyched
Have to think a blowout win is what they would’ve liked
Patriots and Dolphins, Miami’s brand new look
Mike McDaniel’s offense had Bill Belichick’s D shook
Tua looked OK, Tyreek and Waddle balled
Dolphin fans ecstatic, Pats fans are appalled
Ravens and the Jets, Flacco revenge game
Cool Joe did play pretty well, can’t give him much blame
Lamar Jackson’s on a mission, wants to get that big money
Three touchdowns and Ravens win, L-Jack sweet as honey
Jags and the Commanders, this game just seemed weird
First game for Carson Wentz in DC, brought his big red beard
Jaguars were close to grabbing a week one win
At least until week two for victories to begin
Giants and the Titans, King Henry and Saquon
The Titan bruised along, Giant looked like a swan
Another crazy comeback, as New York did their job
Titans played tough in the first half, but ended like slobs
Cardinals and the Chiefs, and a new look KC
Went to Arizona, first opportunity
To see if they still had it after losing some big stars
Five tuddy’s for Pat Mahomes, he did not go too far
Chargers and the Raiders, matchup in LA
Justin Herbert is a stud, and he was on display
Three touchdowns and no picks, his team is 1-0
Raiders have a nice roster, only upwards to go
Vikings and the Packers, A-Rod needs to some talent
He can’t go out and win himself, they guy’s only so gallant
Story is not about him though, Vikings looked pretty good
Kirk Cousins was really sharp, was he misunderstood?
Buccaneers and Cowboys, Sunday night in Dallas
Jerry Jones must love it when we’re focused on his palace
Tough break for Big Jer, as Tom Brady is still here
TB12 wins again, will for 100 years
Sunday State of Mind: August 15th-August 21st
This week’s SSM has it all; mystery absences, crumbling baseball teams, and pro-am basketball.
The GOAT of quarterbacks, Mr. Tom Brady
Has been away for some time now, kind of seems shady
Assuming everyone is fine, the best theory has come
That he’s been filming Masked Singer, if true how great and dumb
Speaking of TB12, what could’ve been in Vegas
Apparently the deal was done, not much more to discuss
Jon Gruden nixed a package deal for Gronk and the QB
Would’ve had two more Super Bowls by now, maybe three
Whose fans feel the worst right now, the White Sox or Yankees
Yanks can’t win a game, La Russa’s brain is filled with bees
New York is at least still leading a tough AL East
Every day Chicago’s playoff chances just decrease
Pro-am basketball has become a hit this summer
The latest was The Crawsover, event was not a bummer
LeBron, Tatum, Holmgren, the lineup was real deep
A cool environment to get to see the big boys leap
A Proper Farewell to Gronk
The end of an era. Actually, a second era after a retirement from the first era and a few years off to party, wrestle, and party some more.
The picture & intro above is the perfect tornado of anarchy that was/is Rob Gronkowski. One of, if not the greatest tight end of all time officially (maybe, probably?) called it a career on Tuesday.
After putting up Hall of Fame numbers in his nine years in New England, retirement one came in 2019 after winning his third Super Bowl ring. In a year that was surely full of self reflection, meditation, and inward study, we were without the polar bear in pads. But we weren’t without athletic Frankenstein’s Monster for long. A few years in Tampa Bay with one of his buddies tacked on another ring for shits and giggles.
Now comes what seems like the real end of the on field road for Gronk. Trying to picture what a structure free, commitment-less life is going to look like for this real life Ivan Drago is like trying to access the dark web; you could probably get there…but you might regret what you see.
Other than the normal beer crushing, hip gyrating, and tongue waggling, what else might there be? Hollywood could be a landing spot, but he’s already proven in those Subway commericials that he can’t remember his lines. What about the crypto game? Gronkcoin sounds like something that definitely wouldn’t tank. Stand up comedy? He would always be guaranteed at least one laugh, that being his own, which is a great laugh, by the way.
Whatever the guy wants to do, he’ll do, and he’ll probably be successful at it. So farewell to one of the greats. Thanks for the entertainment and for always being yourself in an industry that for some reason often shuns that behavior. As always, keep on party rockin’.
Sunday State of Mind: May 30th-June 5th
The weather has turned as we are past the unofficial opening of summer. The beautiful forecast calls for some beautiful sports poetry.
The NBA Finals, Boston and The Bay
Warriors and Celtics are here to play
Al Horford and the boys took game one on the road
If they win again tonight Draymond might explode
Capital One’s The Match, the QB edition
Four of our top quarterbacks in the competition
Brady, Rodgers, Patty, Josh, young guns verse the old
ARod and TB12 took it to them for the gold
Baseball staying relevant, thanks to the NFL
Tommy Pham’s a wildcard, we’re saying “what the hell?”
Who hasn’t wanted to slap a fellow league member
Fantasy football means a lot, Tommy’s got a temper
Avalanche and Rangers, not a lot of spoilers
Both looking for a sweep against the Lightning and the Oilers
Only a few shots left for Tampa and Edmonton
If they don’t get it in gear both squads will soon be done
Sunday State of Mind: January 17th-January 23rd
And then there were four. It’s NFL Divisional Playoff Weekend. We recap in this week’s Sunday State of Mind.
The Cincinnati Bengals, also known as Cinderella
Their quarterback Joe Burrow sure is one talented fella
Bengals went down to Nashville, beat up on the Titans
A young team with big talent, NFL should be frightened
Another major upset, Niners over Green Bay
Defense and special teams for San Francisco saved the day
Jimmy Garoppolo has got to be better next week
Otherwise the Niners Super Bowl chances sure look bleak
An NFC West battle, the Super Bowl’s the prize
The Rams came down to Tampa and stuck it in their eyes
Matt Stafford and that defense ended Tom Brady’s year
Rumors are a-floating, will he end his career?
The best for last, Chiefs and Bills
Regulation not enough, overtime thrills
Time and time again, Mahomes comes out a winner
Andy Reid earned himself a nice triple steak dinner
Sunday State of Mind: January 10th-January 16th
One of the best weekends in sports, Super Wildcard Weekend. We’ve still got plenty to go, but in case you missed anything, let’s review in this week’s Sunday State of Mind.
Raiders and the Bengals, first game yesterday
Joe Burrow and the boys from Cincy for sure had their way
Vegas made it close, almost tied it at the end
After the season the Raiders had, we all should commend
Bills and the Pats, Saturday’s nightcap
This one was over early, an expeditious wrap
Bills Mafia came in force and saw their team ball out
Beat the Pats two out of three, some AFC East clout
Bucs and the Eagles, champions verse Philly
TB12 and the boys made them look silly
The Eagles never got it going, and it really showed
Hard to beat the buzzsaw Brady when in playoff mode
An upset down in Big D, Niners and the boys
San Fran’s offense was too much, really brought the noise
Another big playoff loss for Jerry Jones’ team
Ever since the late 90’s that has been their theme
Bucs at a Crux With Their Roster In Flux
Who could’ve seen it ending this way?
After a sideline dispute and an all-time walk off, Antonio Brown has been released by the Buccaneers. We’re all familiar by now with the he said he said of the dispute between Brown and Bruce Arians. We’re not here to debate who’s right and who’s wrong; but to make fun of all involved.
Antonio Brown is an asshole. Bruce Arians is an asshole. They’re both larger than life characters with flaws. To get to the top of their respective professions means they’re both world class at what they do; but that doesn’t mean we can’t laugh at them when a disaster of magnificent proportions like this happens in front of our eyes.
Brown’s history is just too funny not to look back and reminisce on. Despite the fact that he’s Tom Brady’s old roommate; he’s an eccentric oddball who was literally a homeless person that turned himself into one of the most physically gifted receivers we’ve ever seen. That amazing fact cannot stop us from remembering he habitually does not pay anyone for services rendered, threw furniture out of his 14th story apartment in a childish fit of rage, and rips farts in doctor’s faces. Grade A terrible and comedic behavior for anyone.
Arians is simply funny to look at. He looks like the owner of a shitty bar and grille called “Bruce’s Buoy Bar” in the Florida Keys that offers two for one Landsharks during happy hour. He also looks like the kind of guy who had his stomach pumped twice as a kid for drinking paint; not once…twice. Wrap all of this together with his trademark Kangol hat as a cherry on top, and you’ve got yourself a cartoon character for the ages.
It will be interesting to see how all of this will play out between the Buccaneers and Brown. The NFLPA will inevitably get involved, some more mud slinging will happen between the two sides, and maybe we’ll get a few more funny behind the scenes stories we don’t currently have. Will Brown get another shot in the NFL? Honestly, who cares. Let’s enjoy the shit show we have in front of us now and worry about that another day.
Sunday State of Mind: December 6th-December 12th
We are in full blown holiday season, and the gift of sports keeps on giving. We recap the past seven days of presents in this week’s SSM.
NFL afternoon slate, full of overtime
Bucs and Bills, Niners and Bengals, teams all in their prime
San Francisco, Tampa Bay, both teams with the dubs
All four teams might make the playoffs, none of them are scrubs
Another great week in Jacksonville
For Urban Meyer, dude is not chill
He called his staff losers, things not going well
Looking to move to Florida? Urban may be ready to sell
Big COVID outbreak for the Chicago Bulls
Nine players in quarantine, protocol list is full
Hard to keep momentum going with a thing like this
Hopefully all get well soon or Bulls fans will be pissed
Who Wore it Best? 19-10
The finish line is in sight on our recurring series “Who Wore It Best.” In our penultimate edition, we’re getting into the teens.
19 – Johnny Unitas
Starting off young, fresh, and hip. While 19 turns out to be an incredibly strongly represented number, Unitas is widely known as one of the best quarterbacks to ever play in the NFL. Four championships, three MVPs, and a member of all three of the 50th, 75th and 100th NFL Anniversary Teams gives Johnny U the nod.
Honorable Mentions: Tony Gwynn, Willis Reed, Steve Yzerman, Jonathan Toews
18 – Peyton Manning
Back to back Colts quarterbacks to get us started here. A member of the most recent Pro Football Hall of Fame inductee class, Manning put up some unreal numbers en route to two Super Bowl wins. Manning’s trophy case is busting at the seams with five MVPs, the 2012 Comeback Player of the Year Award, and number retirement plaques for his number 18 in both Indianapolis and Denver.
Honorable Mention: Denis Savard
17 – Todd Helton
Todd Helton played baseball and football at University of Tennessee, and was a teammate of Peyton Manning’s. However, Helton makes our list for his accomplishments on the diamond. Helton retired in 2013 with a career average of .316, 369 home runs, and 2,519 hits. Along the way, he won three Gold Gloves, four Silver Sluggers, and a batting title in 2000.
Honorable Mention: Philip Rivers
16 – Joe Montana
Much like Unitas, Montana is a firm part of the “best quarterback of all-time” conversation. Montana lead the 49ers to four Super Bowl rings, while being the MVP in three of those four wins. One of the more accurate quarterbacks of his time, he lead the NFL in completion percentage five separate seasons.
Honorable Mentions: Whitey Ford, Brett Hull
15 – Bart Starr
If we’re including Johnny Unitas, it’s only fair to involve Bart Starr. The quarterback who lead the Packers to victories in Super Bowls I and II, while winning MVP in both games, finished his career with five championships, a regular season MVP award, and four Pro Bowls.
Honorable Mentions: Carlos Beltran, Jim Edmonds
14 – Pete Rose
Taking a bit of gamble including Rose on our list, but here we are. The all-time hit king (4,256) does have a stellar on-field resumé. Seventeen All-Star games, three World Series rings, the 1973 NL MVP, and two Gold Gloves.
Honorable Mentions: Ernie Banks, Oscar Robertson, Dan Fouts
13 – Wilt Chamberlain
Of course the only man to score 100 points in an NBA game is making our list. Wilt the Stilt averaged a silly 30.9 points per game and 22.9 rebounds per game over his 15 year career. He also won two rings, four MVPs, was a seven time scoring champion, as well as an 11 time rebound champion.
Honorable Mentions: Alex Rodriguez, Dan Marino
12 – Tom Brady
The greatest quarterback of all time at the most important position in sports. TB12’s resumé is too long to outline here; but it’s headlined by his seven Super Bowl rings. On top of that, Brady has lead the league at one point in his career in passing touchdowns, yards, and rating.
Honorable Mentions: John Stockton, Terry Bradshaw, Roger Staubach, Jim Kelly, Joe Namath, Bob Griese, Aaron Rodgers, Jarome Iginla
11 – Mark Messier
Being the center piece of a dynasty goes a long way in lists like these. Messier was the unquestioned leader & captain in Edmonton, where he lead the Oilers to five Stanley Cups. He also became the only player to captain two separate teams to Stanley Cup victories when he lead the Rangers to the cup in 1994.
Honorable Mentions: Barry Larkin, Larry Fitzgerald
10 – Fran Tarkenton
Fran Tarkenton walked to Steve Young, Michael Vick, and the like could run. Not only did Tarkenton sling it for 47,003 yards and 342 touchdowns, he also ran for 3,674 yards and 32 touchdowns in his career. Another fun fact: his only MVP season came in 1975, his 15th year in the NFL.
Honorable Mentions: Walt Frazier, Guy Lafleur
Heavy quarterback representation here. Any other noise was a faint whisper from baseball. Abysmal showing by hockey and basketball. We’ll bid farewell to our ongoing series in the next edition of “Who Wore It Best.”
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