We did it, basketball fans. We’ve found ourselves with a Final Four in this year’s March Madness tournament. In this week’s SSM, we outline the blue bloods, Cinderellas, and others left in the tourney.
Villanova is first, a familiar sight Wildcats never wrong when their coach is Jay Wright Had a hard path bracket, beat Houston’s tough D Coach Wright looking for championship number three
Guess who’s back, back again Duke is back, tell a friend You heard that right, Coach K still alive Even better than Wright, K wants to add to his five
Blue blood number three, the Kansas Jayhawks Continue to win in this college playoff Bill Self and his fake hair are are ready to roll He’s two wins away from the ultimate goal
They killed Cinderella, those stupid Tar Heels Ended St. Peter’s run, stopped their wheels UNC, Final Four, what an absolute shock We all wanted to see those feisty Peacocks
Kylie Jenner posted on her Instagram story Monday that her and partner Travis Scott are changing their son’s name. The currently unnamed newborn was born on February 2, 2022, and was named “Wolf” for the first seven weeks of life.
Much like lips, sometimes things come and go; it happens. I’m sure the artist formerly known as Wolf won’t know any difference.
But, the big question that has the nation on edge: what will the new name be?
We’re here to help. Although these badass Kardashian/Jenner women know how to get their fucking asses up and work, we thought we’d provide some assistance if they’re so inclined.
Wade Elux Jenner
Red Bottoms Jenner
Chase Bank Jenner
Tanner Oil Jenner
Ralph Lauren Jenner
Max Credit Jenner
Milo Naire Jenner
Skip TheLine Jenner
Bo Tox Jenner
Whatever these two crazy kids decide on, I’m sure it will be great…and hopefully final.
We made it, folks. Not just to another Sunday State of Mind, but to March Madness. We dedicate the latest edition of SSM to college basketball’s annual tournament.
Only place to start, the St. Peter’s Peacocks Fifteen seed came to play, major rising stock Beat second seed Kentucky, and then Murray State A classic Cinderella, what makes March Madness great
A big name eleven seed making a little noise Juwan Howard and Michigan, showing some Madness poise A bad regular season, turning it on at the right time Seems like only yesterday, the open hand slap crime
It happens every year, dreaded 12-5 upset This time around Iowa and UConn won’t forget New Mexico ended UConn, Richmond nipped the Hawks That’s why when doing your bracket you just can’t go chalk
Hate it or love it, The Dukies still alive Coach K beat Coach Izzo, the Blue Devils survive This retirement tour does just not seem to end With every win Coach K’s career extends
Some wild news dropped late Monday from the NFL; the league released a memo in which they announced a minimum yearlong suspension for Atlanta Falcons wide receiver Calvin Ridley for betting on games last season.
Ridley had been on leave from the team while the alleged betting took place, so there’s not a whole lot in terms of him receiving inside information or having any distinct advantage. Even still, this is a huge no no for an active player to bet on a game in any league. We all know how Pete Rose has been blackballed from the baseball Hall of Fame for his wagering history. Ridley, of course, is not exactly at the level Rose was, but still a major infraction.
If anyone payed an ounce of attention to Ridley’s Twitter account, we could have seen this coming. The guy tweets like all of us regular schmucks who love gambling but have no idea what we’re doing.
Everyday gamblers can feel the highs and lows of Ridley’s betslip with each tweet:
We’ve all felt this. When you’re in such a bad slump, all you can do is laugh. Show me a bettor who’s gone 0 for his last 6 and I’ll show you the human embodiment of the laughing crying emoji, usually paired with an “I mean, all you can do is laugh at this point” as a cherry on top.
If you’ve gambled for any amount of time or been around those that have, you know that everyone has their own rules. I, for example, “never” bet on my favorite teams. Additionally, if you’ve gambled for any amount of time or been around those that have, you know these rules are always broken. We all say we learn from our Ls, Calvin; but how am I supposed stay away when Iowa’s getting 5.5 at home against Michigan State?!
Gambling responsibly is key. If you choose to dabble, please do so within your means. When you’re not seeing the board as well as you’d like, walk away. You’ll feel better and your account will remain fuller. But you’ve got to have the confidence to know you’re going to be a better gambler when you decide to jump back into the pool.
According to his Twitter account, Ridley claims he only bet $1,500. Plenty of money for a lot of us, but when your career earnings are a shade over $11 million, maybe not the biggest concern. Adam Schefter reported that Ridley “placed multi-legged parlay bets involving 3, 5 and 8 games that included the Falcons to win.”
If that’s indeed the case and he walked away after doing so, vaya con dios…and never bet on the Falcons again.
It’s Sunday, there were sports this week, and we’re in a certain State of Mind.
A special week in Indy, the NFL Combine A chance for NFL prospects to jump, run, and shine Some major workout numbers, athletic freaks galore NFL coaches and GMs jaws dropping to the floor
Surprise news out of Dallas about one of their best Amari Cooper likely gone, Cowboys fans must be stressed The wideout’s too expensive for Jerry Jones’ liking So now their number one receiver will be gone, sent hiking
Still in a holding pattern in the MLB The lockout continues as both sides will not agree On a new CBA, games continue to be lost The longer this goes on, more baseball games get tossed
We talked last week about big scores in the NBA Repeating this week, Jayson Tatum and LBJ JT scored 54 tonight, Bron 56 on Saturday Defenses sat on the sideline and watched the big dogs play
We’ve got our first few tickets punched in the NCAA March Madness is so close, let’s get this underway Murray State, Longwood, and Loyola Chicago You know what that means; Sister Jean’s ready to roll!
Since no one wants to read anything as long as the above-mentioned official corporate memorandums; we decided to do the work for you. Essentially, Murray wants more money and Jeter is out ASAP. Kyler’s statement is comically long, and Jeter’s is almost annoyingly short for such a large member/investor of a team leaving immediately.
We hope KM gets his money and Jeets finally catches a break in life in his post-Marlins tenure. But we’re here as the end all be all rankers of these two very important statements. Please find our extensively researched, categorically honest rankings below:
2 – Derek Jeter’s “Peace I’m Outta Here” Letter
Much like Jeter’s playing career, this was (literally) a black and white, plain Jane, professional statement. Just like he handled the media while with the Yankees, it was a large collection of words that didn’t really say anything.
After a few truths stretched (e.g., “we transformed every aspect of the franchise”) and a yawn or two incurred, a tsunami of drowsiness washed over me while reading. The former CEO’s statement came out as flat as the energy at loanDepot Park during Marlins home games.
As great of a defensive shortstop as Jeter was, he’s an even better defender of being or saying anything interesting.
1 – Kyler Murray’s “It’s Not Me, It’s You” Letter
This thing was a superb mess. Scrubbing your social media of anything relating to your team one week, and releasing this manifesto saying you need more from them the next is an all time power move. While we’ve all seen the “it’s not you, it’s me” checkers move played either to us or to someone we know, Kyler and his agent Erik Burkhardt are playing chess by flipping that bad boy right on its head.
Before so graciously looping in his teammates and coaches, Kyler noted how proud he is of the “extreme turnaround of competitiveness and success since his arrival,” after being “tasked with stepping into a tough situation” in Arizona. Translation: you guys blew before I got here, now pay up. Also, the shade thrown in reminding the Cardinals that he thinks he’s the guy to “deliver the valley their first Super Bowl in 33+ years” was a real *chef’s kiss* in this tour de force.
The finale though, the pie de resistance if you will, is the ending. The 24 year old quarterback told the team that drafted him number one overall in 2019 to shit or get off the pot when it comes to giving him a new contract, while referring to himself as a “rapidly improving…already 2x Pro Bowl QB.” Just an all-time self-confident sign off that I wish I had an ounce of in my personal life.
A few big statements from the MLB and NFL today. Appropriately, one was as boring as a four hour baseball game. The other had the fireworks of a regular season NFL game that America cannot get enough of. You know where we stand.
We’re in a thinner time in the sports schedule then we’d all like, but that won’t stop us from enjoying what we can and waxing poetic in this week’s Sunday State of Mind.
Bad faith negotiations in the MLB The lockout continues, something you hate to see The owners and the players are way too far apart More and more looking like Opening Day late start
Moving to basketball, James Harden holy shit First two games in Philly, seems like a real nice fit Double double Friday, triple dub today Joel Embiid’s new teammate certainly came to play
Some major scoring weekends in the association Ja, Bam, Joel, Kyrie, numbers full of inflation 46, 36, 37, 38 are point totals we saw Offensive performances leaving fans in awe
Georgetown Hoyas basketball, program’s a dumpster fire For head coach Patrick Ewing this was a job that he desired Eighteen straight losses, haven’t won since 2021 Two more games for the Hoyas and the season’s finally done
With our Super Bowl hangovers cured, it’s time to move along in the sports calendar. This week’s SSM reviews the week that was in sports.
Baseball’s continued locked out, two sides can not agree Between the player’s union and owners from the MLB Spring Training scheduled for last week, of course that’s a no go Hopefully resolve comes soon so we can see The Show
NBA All-Star Weekend, they always do it right Skills, three point, and dunk contest happened Saturday night Cavs, KAT, and Obi, winners respectively Team LeBron beat Team Durant tonight on TNT
College basketball fight! But not between the players Michigan’s Juwan Howard was the slap conveyor Wisconsin winning big, but called a late timeout Pissed off the Wolverines and lead to the postgame coach bout
Total annihilation of the heart. Woodley indicated that Rodgers was too football-focused to be committed to their relationship. Now whether that’s a Big Little Lie or not, we may never know. All we can ascertain at this point is that she has become Divergent of the relationship with the Packers quarterback. We aren’t here to put The Fault on either of these Stars.
Rodgers, one of the best to ever do it, has seen this play out before. It, of course, being losing family. The reigning NFL MVP will now get a Discount Double Check on meals as he’ll no longer be paying for two. After today’s excruciating news, Rodgers will not be adding a wedding ring to his one Super Bowl ring; and has been immunized from being in a relationship.
With the status of his engagement no longer in Jeopardy, will the NFL’s Most Valuable Player commit to another year of football? Only time will tell.
It is with profound sadness we write this week’s SSM, as the football season is officially over. Since we don’t want to see football go, we’re recapping the game that just happened; with the Los Angeles Rams winning the Lombardi Trophy in Super Bowl 56.
First quarter some action, a 7-3 score An OBJ touchdown, but there would be more Bengals mustered a field goal, but scoring was not hearty Final score in mind, may have kept them from the Lombardi
A busy second quarter, plenty to talk about Cooper Kupp scored once, Bengals ended their end zone drought Terrible sight to see, Odell Beckham hurt his knee Rams were down a playmaker after the injury
Maybe better than the game, the Pepsi Halftime Show A collection of nostalgia singing songs that we all know Snoop and Dre were great, Em, Kendrick, Mary J How about Mr. In Da Club, please give us a replay
Cincinnati came out hot after the halftime break A Burrow bomb to Higgins, would LA start to shake? The 75 yard touchdown would be the highIight here Other than trading field goals, the game’s ending was near
Only one score in the final frame, but it was the winner Stafford to Cooper Kupp a second time, chicken dinner With that touchdown the Rams secured a Super victory Cemented themselves as champions, NFL history
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