Jim Irsay

Untimed Down Sports 2022 in Review

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Photo: Matrix Group

Some Thursday thoughts for the boys and girls as we reflect back on 2022.

We had the completely original idea to recap our top 10 stories of the year.

A sincere thank you to all who check out any of our stuff, please continue to do so. For those that don’t, we have an idea for your New Year’s resolution.

10. Aaron Rodgers & Shailene Woodley Split

Photo: People

The sports and pop culture worlds were both crushed at the completely surprising split of super couple Aaron Rodgers and Shailene Woodley back in February.

9. Jeff Saturday Hired as New Colts Head Coach

Photo: Colts.com

This one we’re still enjoying as the year comes to a close. Jim Irsay went full Jim Irsay and hired a guy who played for him over a decade ago with zero non-high school coaching experience. We wanted to hop on the train and fill out the remainder of Mr. Irsay’s dream coaching staff.

8. Russell Wilson Continues to Be a Dork

Photo: Sports Illustrated

This blog was written in May 2020, and was still our eighth most read in 2022. That’s a compliment to both how many times Russ makes all of us cringe and how great you readers are that you keep coming back to this blog.

7. Daniel Snyder is Going to Get All of Our Asses

Photo: Commanders.com

Remember in October when the human version of Mr. Burns Daniel Snyder threatened to take down the other 31 NFL owners? That was great, and scared us into some serious confessions.

6. Kylie Jenner’s Baby is a Horse With No Name

Photo: Refinery29

We all deserve a second chance in life, right? Kyle Jenner certainly believes so, as she renamed her son after a month and a half or so trail period of naming him “Wolf.” Ever the helpers we are, we put together some names we thought might fit. We really liked “Skip TheLine Jenner” but that’s just us.

5. Steve Nash Gets the Brooklyn Boot

Photo: Fadeaway World

Amidst a hurricane tornado of controversy (non of his own doing) Steve Nash was finally freed of his duties of having to coach the Brooklyn Nets last month. We used an AI generator to create his cover letter for his next job.

4. Heard vs. Depp, the Shit Show Trail of the Century

Photo: E! News

This trail was dumped on us for over a month. It was foul, repugnant, and stunk. But we wrote about it anyways.

3. Finally, Some Sex Appeal Back in the NFL

Photo: NY Daily News

News exploded in January that the Carolina Panthers were bringing in former Giants head coach and fashion icon Ben McAdoo as their offensive coordinator. It didn’t really work, but was fun while it lasted.

2. NBA “City Edition” Jerseys are Back

Photo: NBA.com

You guys love reading these, and we love writing them. This yearly blog is always up there on page views; making dumb jokes about each jersey is something we all enjoy.

1. The Over Hits on Calvin Ridley Suspensions (0.5)

Photo: atlantafalcons.com

Our top-read blog in 2022 was an easy bet: Calvin Ridley was suspended in March for gambling on NFL games. We did some serious journalism and analyzed his Twitter account to find if we missed any signs before his gambling habit was discovered.

Wow, what a look back at the year that was. We truly went to some interesting and dumb places together, didn’t we? If you enjoy what we do, tell a friend to tell a friend.

In all seriousness, we truly appreciate your eyes and readership. On to 2023, where maybe Russell Wilson won’t be such a goober.

Filling Out Jim Irsay’s Dream Coaching Staff

Chris Cook, , , , , , 1 Comment

Photo: Colts.com

Say what you will about Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay…guy does it his way. After four plus seasons of 8,000 year old quarterbacks and a disappointing 3-5-1 start to the season, Frank Reich was fired as head coach of the Colts on Monday.

Anytime a midseason head coaching change happens, organizations are usually in turmoil, and a bedrock of sustainability become top priority to coach out the remainder of the season.

After five stellar seasons of coaching high school football, Jeff Saturday finally gets his shot.

That’s right, the current (former?) ESPN analyst is swapping out his tie for a whistle. Saturday will take over a bad team, rookie quarterback, and no offensive coordinator. Should be great!

While the Colts try and trudge their way through the rest of the season, we’ve tried to look inside Jim Irsay’s brain to see what his ideal coaching staff would look like around Coach Saturday.

Offensive Coordinator – Peyton Manning

I mean, this is a layup.

Of course this would be a perfect fit; fourteen seasons, a Super Bowl, and all of the Colts passing records.

Hiring The Sheriff would be, while a long shot, a slam dunk hire by Irsay.

Defensive Coordinator – Buddy Ryan

Ryan is known as one of the greatest defensive minds to ever coach in the NFL. Rex & Rob’s dad was a part of two Super Bowl winning defenses.

Even though Ryan crossed the proverbial rainbow bridge in 2016, there’s no doubt Irsay will reach out to gauge interest, if he hasn’t already.

Special Teams Coordinator – A Colts Colored Fender Stratocaster

If you’ve been around Mr. Irsay at all, you know he is a man of many vices.

As much as he loves his Colts, he may love music even more. This limited edition electric Stratocaster with maple fingerboard in Lake Placid Blue is as special as the unit it’d be coaching.

Strength Coach – Jim Irsay

Look at that hoss!

That’s is the kind of billionaire who isn’t afraid to get in there and mix it up with the boys. That weightlifting belt is on in the weight room and the boardroom.

Mr. Irsay? More like Mr. Universe!

Hiring Jeff Saturday with only high school coaching experience is just the beginning. The Indianapolis Colts have just started a revolution that will soon take over the NFL with a dynastic flare that will make the 2000’s Patriots look like…well the Colts do now.

May we all have the gusto to live as bravely as Jim Irsay.