Memphis Grizzlies

Is Derrick Rose the Greatest Plant Name in Sports?

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Photo: LALSOFT

Derrick Rose announced his retirement today. The youngest MVP in NBA history has called it a career after 15 seasons with the Bulls, Knicks, Cavaliers, Timberwolves, Pistons, and Grizzlies.

The only thing that may have surpassed his athleticism is his name. But does he have the best botanical name in sports? Let’s dig in.

Basil McRae – played 18 seasons in the NHL, recording 52 goals and 83 assists.

Bud Adams – former owner of the Tennessee Titans.

Jasmine Jones – fourth place finisher in the 2024 Olympic 400 meter hurdles.

Ted Lilly – won 130 games, career ERA of 4.14.

Clover – the 2024 NBA champion Boston Celtics.

The Masters Azaleas – beautiful.

Pretty clear cut here. The seeds of interest have lead us down this interesting road, but our opinion here is pretty deep rooted. Derrick Rose is one of the greatest “what ifs” stories in sports, but we won’t make this blog too sappy. So, we wish a happy retirement to Pooh.

It’s Called Fashion, Look It Up: 2023 NBA “City Edition” Jerseys

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Photo: NBA.com

Our fourth annual NBA City Edition Jersey fashion blog is here and it’s spectacular.

One of our favorite traditions since the 2020-2021 season, we dive deep into each jersey and provide the finest fashion commentary on the internet.

Atlanta Hawks – very modern choice going with the Sex and the City opening credit font.

Boston Celtics – groundbreaking to use a different team’s current jersey as your City Editions.

Brooklyn Nets – much like fashion and art, I’m finding it difficult to comprehend Ben Simmons’ modeling mean mug.

Charlotte Hornets – if a team’s going to be boring, at least make their City Edition jerseys exciting.

Chicago Bulls – a lot of empty surface area on the right side, a black hole signifying the current state of the franchise.

Cleveland Cavaliers – if the Cavs had any self awareness, their City Edition jerseys would have Comic Sans as the font every year.

Dallas Mavericks – hopefully Kyrie Irving doesn’t demand a trade before he gets a chance to wear these.

Denver Nuggets – there are more numbers on this jersey than times Nikola Jokić has smiled on a basketball court.
Detroit Pistons – these aren’t the Grant Hills…and therefore are dumb.

Golden State Warriors – the Dubs have always been a progressive franchise, and they continue with this look dedicated to Caitlin Clark.

Houston Rockets – the H in H-Town here stands for habanero because these bad boys are fire.

Indiana Pacers – congratulations to the Pacers for breaking the color barrier; this tweet is exactly what Jackie Robinson fought for.

Los Angeles Clippers – after trading for James Harden, they’re using their City Edition jerseys to try and get Wizards Michael Jordan to also join the squad.

Los Angeles Lakers – always smart to connect with the youth. The Lakers do it perfectly here with their Minecraft Edition jerseys.

Memphis Grizzlies – the lettering here is really cool, almost as uncool as the size six number font.

Miami Heat – they usually win this thing every year, but these are a rare L.

Milwaukee Bucks – anytime you tweet “Electric,” you simply cannot have Kris Middleton as your main feature.

Minnesota Timberwolves – I am as shocked at these jerseys as I am to learn Mike Conley plays is still in the league.

New Orleans Pelicans – I don’t think the Pelicans realized their City Editions were going to be released after spooky season.

New York Knicks – are you dizzy looking at these like I am?

Oklahoma City Thunder – the Jason Richardson Warriors would like a word.

Orlando Magic – the Disney patch always perplexes me…does that company really need to advertise?

Philadelphia 76ers – I’m no advertising expert, but wondering the strategy behind having the MVP cross his arms over the entire design.

Phoenix Suns – the Suns always do City Editions the right way, no change this year.

Portland Trailblazers – this year, “Rip City” stands for the Blazers ripping apart Damian Lillard’s lust for the Miami Heat.

Sacramento Kings – a sad depature from the past few years having “Sac Town” pasted across the chest.

San Antonio Spurs – while these are great, the front of the jersey should’ve just been the Eiffel Tower with Wemby’s face on top.

Toronto Raptors – as of the publishing this blog, the Raptors have not put these jerseys on their socials…and I can understand why.

Utah Jazz – remember when Grimace was taking everything over?

Washington Wizards – tank the season, tank your City Edition jerseys.

Some fun ones, some trash, all fun to talk about. The NBA is back!

Sunday State of Mind: May 8th-May 14th

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Photo: Wallpapers.com

This Mother’s Day, SSM stands for Sweet, Sweet Moms.

Conference Finals set, NBA winding down
Still a bunch of good games left, so we should not frown
Lakers and the Nuggets, Celtics and the Heat
Next round is the finals, East and West champs set to meet

Weird story in St. Louis, involves their big offseason signing
Moving around positions ’cause the team’s not really shining
Willson Contreras back and forth from the outfield
Cards have not been good so far, reasons seem concealed

This guy Ja Morant, can’t wrap my brain around it
Waving a gun around again, second wave of clown shit
So much for that interview, said he would be better
In dangerous Insta stories, this guy is the pacesetter

We’re Calling Bullshit on the Memphis Grizzlies

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Photo: NBA.com

The Memphis Grizzlies just announced that Dillon “The Villain” Brooks will not return to the team “under any circumstances.”

I mean…my God, dramatic much?

Unless you don’t watch the NBA or live on Mars, Brooks certainly had himself an April. After unconscionably shitting on LeBron James, subsequently getting shit on by LeBron in comedically quick fashion, and choosing the route of being a glass house coward and not facing the media, Brooks is out of a job.

It’s hard to remember an organization being so overt in announcing their roster decisions. We as a society of sports fans need to be better at holding our teams accountable.

With that in mind, can we really believe the Memphis Grizzlies wouldn’t bring back Brooks back under ANY circumstance?

If they really needed a big body who knew their system, and the free agency pool and trade market wasn’t flush with opportunities, you’re telling me the Grizz wouldn’t sign him? Hmmm…

What if NBA commissioner Adam Silver made a rule that every team needed a 6’6 Canadian who went to the University of Oregon on their roster? You’re telling me that’s a community flush with NBA talent that the Grizzlies could just pick one of the litter? I don’t know…

It feels like the world’s been on the brink of ending for the last five years or so, right? What if the entire universe crumbled, and all that was left was Memphis, Tennessee? They’ve got to fill that roster somehow, right? Sounds like Brooks would still be available to re-sign in that circumstance.

All I’m saying is…never say never. Dillon Brooks has spent his entire career with the Grizzlies up to this point. To not give this man a proper sendoff and publicly squashing any chance of a reunion just seems mean…also not 100% true.

Sunday State of Mind: April 17th-April 23rd

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Photo: UNEP

Unlike Ben Simmons…we’re not sitting this round out. SSM is live.

Bring out the brooms in Philly, Sixers roll the Nets
Beat Brooklyn on Friday to win the series in straight sets
Injuries and suspensions became the big headline
A first round series sweep is the perfect design

The hottest team in baseball, you will never guess
It’s usually a team who by this time’s always a mess
A team who’s name is usually followed by the word “sucks”
It’s the Pittsburgh Pirates, seven game win streak for the Bucs

We shouldn’t give it more attention than it really deserves
But all we have to say about Dillon Brooks is, THE NERVE
Tried to come at LeBron, was thoroughly embarrassed
A poorly failed attempt to gain some ground on The King’s terrace

Our Third Annual NBA “City Edition” Jersey Analysis

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Photo: NBA.com

It’s that time of year! For the third consecutive season, the fashion department here at UDS has been called upon to make stupid jokes about the latest versions of the NBA “City Edition” jerseys. Let’s get right down to business.

Atlanta Hawks – slick font, but use the peach font you cowards.
Boston Celtics – very cool to hit copy and paste from the Bucks normal uni’s.
Brooklyn Nets – just like last years, using the “Friends” font makes this jersey dumb…but there’s not much the Nets could’ve done that’s worse than what’s going on with that organization right now.
Charlotte Hornets – more like Charlotte Hornys, amirite?

Chicago Bulls – I think the designer for this one forgot the assignment was due at midnight and remembered at 11:53PM.

Cleveland Cavaliers – these jerseys are giving an original Mario level feel; for that reason this one gets a pass.
Dallas Mavericks – another good effort here. Still irrationally angry that a player as great as Luka Dončić wears number 77.
Denver Nuggets – we may have our annual winner of “high school team from a Disney movie” uniforms.
Detroit Pistons – eh, this is an L. Just give us the Grant Hill throwbacks and call it a day.
Golden State Warriors – very cool to dip the bottom of your jerseys in pollen; bumblebees everywhere loving this.
Houston Rockets – same look as last year, same result. These are a winner.
Indiana Pacers – we have enough shortages in this country; the Pacers have now added a thread shortage to the list.
Los Angeles Clippers – uh…these are at least the best uniforms in LA.
Los Angeles Lakers – there needs to be a federal investigation into why the Lakers keep trying to incorporate black into their uniforms.
Memphis Grizzlies – very lazy to copy the Vlade Divac/Peja Stojaković era Kings uniforms.
Miami Heat – these are pretty similar to last year, but Miami wins this race every year and they’re right up there again.
Milwaukee Bucks – these are a mix of last year’s uniforms and the Kevin Garnett era Timberwolves…yucky.
Minnesota Timberwolves – speaking of the T’wolves…these are like the rough draft of the Nets uni’s.
New Orleans Pelicans – these are fine…would be way better if there were sewed on beads across the front.
Oklahoma City Thunder – this poor organization has never done this well; so not much to expect here. Much like the Pistons, they should just do the Supersonics uniforms.
Orlando Magic – while these aren’t a huge jump from their normal ‘fits, the fact that they didn’t incorporate orange this year like they have in the past is a win.
Philadelphia 76ers – as good as these are, the fact that they’re sponsored by a crypto website make these super sus.
Phoenix Suns – the Suns have nailed these in the past; but I think the Spurs have a case for copyright infringement with these bad boys.
Portland Trailblazers – these are like the away jerseys of the Suns jerseys, and should be included in the Spurs lawsuit. Big year for teal in the NBA.
Sacramento Kings – these are the “high school team from a Disney movie” runner ups, boring.
San Antonio Spurs – exhibit A in the aforementioned legal action suggested in this blog. These are the winners.
Toronto Raptors – so the Bulls designer also worked with the Raptors? Got it.
Washington Wizards – some very flowy flowers heavily featured here…can we start the Wizards to Hawaii rumors?

Wow…another year, another set of middle-of-the-road uniforms with even worse jokes to go with them. Thanks for the opportunity to create content, NBA.

Sunday State of Mind: May 9th-May 15th

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Photo: New Atlas

We were drowning in series-deciding games in the NBA Playoffs this weekend. Eliminations and game sevens were flying everywhere this week, and SSM is here for it.

Got started on Thursday night, Heat and 76ers
Joel Embiid came back but could not be Philly’s fixer
Jimmy Butler showed up, James Harden disappeared
Both teams said things after the game that were kinda weird

For the Memphis Grizzlies, Friday night was it
The Warriors are back to being the absolute shit
Klay and Steph were back up to their old splash brother ways
Going to the conference finals, hitting threes for days

Sunday was a big one, two game sevens on the slate
Bucks and the Celtics were the first game on our sports plate
This one was at The Garden, and Boston held their ground
With the win the Celtics, are now Miami bound

The finale of the weekend, Suns and the Mavs
Dallas is full of grown up cows, no more baby calves
A tough matchup awaits them, the Warriors are no joke
With Luka and J. Brunson, this team is far from broke

Sunday State of Mind: April 25th-May 1st

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Photo: CNN

A jam-packed sports schedule lends itself to a few reminders here and there. That’s what SSM is for, you’re welcome.

The picking of the prospects, the NFL Draft
Fans getting new players finding out how their roster’s staffed
Draft grades make no sense, have to give these guys some time
To see if they’ll be good or bad, substandard or sublime

Round two NBA Playoffs are starting today
Eight teams left, four East four West, still able to play
Injuries aplenty, still plenty guys to see
Best time of the year NBA fans will all agree

Major League Baseball dropped the damn hammer
Threw out pitcher Trevor Bauer in the baseball slammer
A two year suspension, for some bad off field stuff
Search it at your own risk, it is pretty rough

Sunday State of Mind: April 18th-April 24th

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Photo: Wallpaper Access

Another week come and gone, another Sunday State of Mind.

An always touching tribute, a statue was revealed
This week in Oklahoma this one should have stayed concealed
Poor Baker Mayfield, guy can’t catch a break
If I were him that statue would have ended up in a lake

Big loss in Chicago, Eloy Jimenez
Out for up to two months, so the doctor says
Add another name to the White Sox injury list
Tough break for a good team, that bat will be missed

A happier baseball note, it’s Miguel Cabrera
Joined the 3k hit club, maybe the last in this era
Only 32 other players have reached that career mark
Miggy one of the greatest to do it at the ballpark

NBA playoffs are here, and some teams are in trouble
Raptors, Bulls, Nets and Nuggets are all on the bubble
Mavs and Jazz, Grizz and Wolves both sitting at 2-2
We get action everyday as the games continue

If you’ve ever read this blog, you know we love NASCAR
Driving for 500 miles but not going far
The most famous track in all of motor sports
The Talladega Speedway, running today of course

Sunday State of Mind: February 21st-February 27th

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Photo: Free Creatives

We’re in a thinner time in the sports schedule then we’d all like, but that won’t stop us from enjoying what we can and waxing poetic in this week’s Sunday State of Mind.

Bad faith negotiations in the MLB
The lockout continues, something you hate to see
The owners and the players are way too far apart
More and more looking like Opening Day late start

Moving to basketball, James Harden holy shit
First two games in Philly, seems like a real nice fit
Double double Friday, triple dub today
Joel Embiid’s new teammate certainly came to play

Some major scoring weekends in the association
Ja, Bam, Joel, Kyrie, numbers full of inflation
46, 36, 37, 38 are point totals we saw
Offensive performances leaving fans in awe

Georgetown Hoyas basketball, program’s a dumpster fire
For head coach Patrick Ewing this was a job that he desired
Eighteen straight losses, haven’t won since 2021
Two more games for the Hoyas and the season’s finally done