Jets’ fans Super Bowl dreams were dashed in four plays last night when Aaron Rodgers’ achilles exploded.
The roster is in place for a run right now, but since no one loves Zach Wilson like we do, reports are already surfacing that the Jets are making calls on other quarterbacks:
The roster has been impeccably assembled, and the main reason that Rodgers came to New York in the first place.
So, lets hash out the Jets’ best options.
Marcus Mariota
The current backup in Philadelphia has plenty of not terrible starting experience.
Sitting behind Jalen Hurts is a pretty good gig, but another shot to start after things didn’t end well in Atlanta might be tempting.
Cooper Rush
Rush showed he was more than capable while subbing in for noted weirdo Dak Prescott last year.
If he could do that with a good Dallas roster, who says he can’t recapture the magic with the Jets?
Tom Brady
Obviously, the photoshops are already there…hay’s in the barn as they say.
This would be the funniest result, especially after the suck fest the Patriots and TB12 just had a few days ago.
If Brady’s not coming back with the Jets, he’s coming for Jimmy Garoppolo (again) anyways.
Dan Marino
You’re telling me this mf who was throwing for almost 50 tuddy’s and 5,000 yards in the 80’s couldn’t stand back and sling it in 2023?
Marino to the Jets is at LEAST 10-7, guaranteed.
A Fire Hydrant
This roster is so stupid good this thing to the left could stand back there and lead Gang Green to their first Lombardi Trophy since 1969.
Unless you live under a rock under a mega yacht under a skyscraper, you know Taylor Swift announced 1989 (Taylor’s Version) is on the way.
T-Swift, as her friends call her, is well known for the Easter eggs she loves to drop. With that in mind, what sports takes from the soon to be re-released song titles is Taylor giving us?
All You Had to Do Was Stay
Is TS taking the side of Bill Belichick in the Tom Brady divorce? We all had an opinion of who was right and wrong here, she does too.
TB12 went on to win a Super Bowl without BB, but it sounds like TS wanted TB and BB to be together forever…can’t blame her for believing in love, folks.
Wildest Dreams
One of the greatest sports photos of all-time; Muhammad Ali (then still Cassius Clay) upset Sonny Liston as a 8-1 underdog.
A fine tribute by one of today’s biggest entertainers to one of the most polarizing athletes and performers in history.
Bad Blood
Who doesn’t remember the Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton story?
A nice throwback by Tay Tay to teammates casually pulling loaded guns on each other in the actual locker room.
Blank Space
Taylor’s pretty New York adjacent; and for her to take the time to write and dedicate an entire song to former Giants’ quarterback Eli Manning’s face is a touching tribute.
Out of the Woods
In 2016, the Chicago Cubs broke their 108 year World Series drought lead by Anthony Rizzo, Kris Bryant, and Jon Lester, among others.
Even if the team has mostly been disbanded at this point, they brought generations of fans and an entire franchise out of the woods.
If we’ve learned anything, it’s that sports and entertainment are forever intertwined. It’s no surprise that one of the largest names in modern entertainment has so many blatant sports takes that are totally correct and in no way made up for blogging purposes.
Those crazy bastards at NFL HQ have done it again.
The 2023 schedule release has been dropped, and there are some absolute bangers we’re in for next season.
After crunching the numbers and reviewing the entire history of NFL schedule releases, we are flabbergasted at how the NFL came up with some of these matchups.
Patriots vs. Jets – Week 3
I mean, holy shit. This is insane!
The New England Patriots and New York Jets. So much history between coaches, players, and regional hate.
Two franchises that have both had Bill Parcells and Bill Belichick as head coaches at one point in time.
The fact that those crazy fucks from the NFL came up with this matchup is borderline psychotic.
Ravens vs. Steelers – Week 5
You didn’t think the NFL would be this maniacal? You’re wrong, jabroni. These schedule makers are sadistic AF.
You really throw the record book out when these two teams get together. The fact that it happens so rarely makes it even better when we get this clash.
The uniform combos are pure, the defenses are always tough, and we are shook that we get to see these two light it up next year.
Cowboys vs. Eagles – Week 14
They can’t really get away with this, can they?
These NFL schedule makers are just going to schedule Bears/Packers and act like they just didn’t pull of a miracle?!
Both of these teams are loaded with talent. This matchup may just be decided by who’s fanbase can be more unbearable by the fourth quarter, when it counts.
Bears vs. Packers – Week 1
Light me on fire, slap me in the face, and throw me over a cliff, this matchup is deranged.
The Packers have had some serious playoff woes, coming off another first round exit last season.
In fact, Green Bay has lost nine postseason matchups since 2011 (the Bears losing only twice in that span), but this early season matchup may set the tone for both of these franchise’s 2023-2024 seasons.
At this point, the NFL schedule reveal is overwhelming. They’re just pounding us over the head with wackadoodle pairings that I’m not sure we as football fans deserve, nor will be able to handle. The NFL is king, and they proved it once again today.
If you’re not a Bengals, Jaguars, Chargers, Ravens, or Dolphins fan, odds are that you’re hoping to see the Bills and Chiefs play in the AFC Championship Game.
Mahomes v. Allen, Bills Mafia v. Chiefs Kingdom, McDermott vs. Big Red Andy Reid; this matchup would have the most storylines by far of any AFC pairing we as football fans could get for a shot to go to the Super Bowl.
Well, it appears if our collective dreams are answered, there’ll be one more: the game will be played in the most logical place of all, Atlanta.
Yes, beautiful Atlanta. The A. The Dirty. Home of the NFC South’s own Falcons who haven’t seen the playoffs in six years. Whose most memorable postseason is still meme’d to death almost a decade later.
There has to be one of the dozens of Falcon fans out there that really hopes this potential AFC Championship game being held in their stadium is going to brainwash the internet into forgetting that the Falcons blew a 28-3 lead against the Patriots. If you are that person and are reading this, please reach out to chris@untimeddown.com; I would love to speak with you and get inside your brain.
For now, let’s all enjoy Super Wild Card Weekend and root for the Dolphins not to pull the biggest upset in playoff history by beating the Bills on Saturday. Because if they do, all of this Atlanta mess will be for not and me writing and you reading this blog will have been a massive waste of time.
Our first SSM in a world that has Lionel Messi atop the World Cup throne. But what else happened this week?
Craziest win of the football season Patriots lateral for some reason Right to the Raiders, a strange outcome Poor Jakobi Meyers just has to feel numb
Another weird one, Cowboys and the Jags One that Big D thought they had in the bag An OT pick six thrown by Dak Prescott A win was for sale, and Jacksonville bought
MLB free agent shortstops are set The group of big four, money they did get Turner, Bogaerts, Correa and Swanson Enough contracts, can offseason be done?
Frank Gore Jr. still might be running A LendingTree Bowl performance that was stunning A cool three hundred and twenty-nine yards Senior must be proud, his boy is a star
It’s a cold hard fact that the sports week is coming to an end. We review in this week’s SSM.
Let’s start with the world’s game, AKA jogo bonito The World Cup is finally back, a fact you cannot veto Always great to see the best footballers, smooth like butter The only question left; do you say it Qatar or Qatar?
Cowboys and the Vikings, game of the week potential Result of this game is without question consequential Thought it would be a good one, battle of some studs Cowboys blew them out, Vikings may be duds
Patriots and Jets, setting football back Decades with this one, neither team on track Pats won on a walk off, a punt return touchdown Jets punted 10 times, offense full of clowns
It is time we talk about the best NBA team These guys just come out every night with a head full of steam They’ve won six straight, are very hot, doing some crazy things Our current favorite team is the Sacramento Kings
A brutal crash and burn for Tennessee football Big tumble for a team that was just standing so tall Lost their starting quarterback, and the game by 25 Any playoff chances for them are no longer alive
We continue a longstanding tradition here at UDS by dedicating an entire SSM to Week One NFL action.
Big start on Thursday night, Rams and the Bills Pregame program was legit, full of fluff and frills The game was in LA, but plenty Bills fans there Josh Allen and the boys came out and won the game with flair
Sunday start in the dirty, Falcons and the Saints Start of football season, we have no complaints Something so familiar, Falcons had an early lead They coughed it up and lost, almost guaranteed
Browns and the Panthers, Baker revenge bowl He wanted to win this game with his entire soul Browns came out and played, got a surprising win Panthers almost came back, there’s a positive spin
The San Francisco 49ers are used to good weather The conditions in Chicago, they were different all together It rained and rained and rained some more, really came down strong A nice win for the Bears in a season that might be long
Steelers and the Bengals, an AFC North tilt Bengals came in walking tall, like a man on stilts Five turnovers for Joe Burrow, not like him at all Even so, we had OT, but the Bengals did fall
Eagles and the Lions, closer than we expected! Coming into the day, thought this game would be neglected Lions got down early, then almost came back Lot of money on the Eagles, banks almost attacked
Texans and the Colts, folks we have a tie Same score in regulation, OT, and then the game died Feels like a win for Houston, Indy can not be psyched Have to think a blowout win is what they would’ve liked
Patriots and Dolphins, Miami’s brand new look Mike McDaniel’s offense had Bill Belichick’s D shook Tua looked OK, Tyreek and Waddle balled Dolphin fans ecstatic, Pats fans are appalled
Ravens and the Jets, Flacco revenge game Cool Joe did play pretty well, can’t give him much blame Lamar Jackson’s on a mission, wants to get that big money Three touchdowns and Ravens win, L-Jack sweet as honey
Jags and the Commanders, this game just seemed weird First game for Carson Wentz in DC, brought his big red beard Jaguars were close to grabbing a week one win At least until week two for victories to begin
Giants and the Titans, King Henry and Saquon The Titan bruised along, Giant looked like a swan Another crazy comeback, as New York did their job Titans played tough in the first half, but ended like slobs
Cardinals and the Chiefs, and a new look KC Went to Arizona, first opportunity To see if they still had it after losing some big stars Five tuddy’s for Pat Mahomes, he did not go too far
Chargers and the Raiders, matchup in LA Justin Herbert is a stud, and he was on display Three touchdowns and no picks, his team is 1-0 Raiders have a nice roster, only upwards to go
Vikings and the Packers, A-Rod needs to some talent He can’t go out and win himself, they guy’s only so gallant Story is not about him though, Vikings looked pretty good Kirk Cousins was really sharp, was he misunderstood?
Buccaneers and Cowboys, Sunday night in Dallas Jerry Jones must love it when we’re focused on his palace Tough break for Big Jer, as Tom Brady is still here TB12 wins again, will for 100 years
The end of an era. Actually, a second era after a retirement from the first era and a few years off to party, wrestle, and party some more.
The picture & intro above is the perfect tornado of anarchy that was/is Rob Gronkowski. One of, if not the greatest tight end of all time officially (maybe, probably?) called it a career on Tuesday.
After putting up Hall of Fame numbers in his nine years in New England, retirement one came in 2019 after winning his third Super Bowl ring. In a year that was surely full of self reflection, meditation, and inward study, we were without the polar bear in pads. But we weren’t without athletic Frankenstein’s Monster for long. A few years in Tampa Bay with one of his buddies tacked on another ring for shits and giggles.
Now comes what seems like the real end of the on field road for Gronk. Trying to picture what a structure free, commitment-less life is going to look like for this real life Ivan Drago is like trying to access the dark web; you could probably get there…but you might regret what you see.
Other than the normal beer crushing, hip gyrating, and tongue waggling, what else might there be? Hollywood could be a landing spot, but he’s already proven in those Subway commericials that he can’t remember his lines. What about the crypto game? Gronkcoin sounds like something that definitely wouldn’t tank. Stand up comedy? He would always be guaranteed at least one laugh, that being his own, which is a great laugh, by the way.
Whatever the guy wants to do, he’ll do, and he’ll probably be successful at it. So farewell to one of the greats. Thanks for the entertainment and for always being yourself in an industry that for some reason often shuns that behavior. As always, keep on party rockin’.
One of the best weekends in sports, Super Wildcard Weekend. We’ve still got plenty to go, but in case you missed anything, let’s review in this week’s Sunday State of Mind.
Raiders and the Bengals, first game yesterday Joe Burrow and the boys from Cincy for sure had their way Vegas made it close, almost tied it at the end After the season the Raiders had, we all should commend
Bills and the Pats, Saturday’s nightcap This one was over early, an expeditious wrap Bills Mafia came in force and saw their team ball out Beat the Pats two out of three, some AFC East clout
Bucs and the Eagles, champions verse Philly TB12 and the boys made them look silly The Eagles never got it going, and it really showed Hard to beat the buzzsaw Brady when in playoff mode
An upset down in Big D, Niners and the boys San Fran’s offense was too much, really brought the noise Another big playoff loss for Jerry Jones’ team Ever since the late 90’s that has been their theme
On Thursday, ESPN’s always riveting morning show Get Up held what we’ve all come to expect; lively debate with hard hitting analysis.
During another exhilarating conversation, the panel moved to this week’s opening round of the NFL playoffs. While talking about Josh Allen’s issues with cold weather, Bart Scott gave his best suggestion to improve the Bills quarterback’s chances to lead his team to victory over the Patriots:
“Josh Allen listening? Can people get this message to him? Vi-a-gra. Take a viagra before the game, baby.” — Bart Scott
Added: “A lot of NFL players, at least in my day, took viagra.”
After this clip aired, Scott continued his diatribe and provided some additional tips:
“Soup. Find your best soup place in Buffalo and down that super bowl of broth and noodles.”
“Layer, layer, layer. Throw on 3-4 long sleeves under your shoulder pads to guarantee warmth.”
“Take a shot of hot sauce. Tobasco, Cholula, Frank’s Redhot; anything will do.”
“Halftime shower. X’s and O’s be dammed; in game adjustments pale in comparison to body heat. Boil up a pot of water to 425 degrees, strip down, and engulf yourself in some blazing H20.”
“The cold can cause joint and muscle pain, we all know that. Take some IcyHot, and jam it in any and all orifices of your body. Both nostrils, eyeballs, buttcrack. Stick it in to win is what I always say.”
“This is probably obvious, but train in the ancient art of fire eating.”
It’s always interesting to see the inside tips and tricks that professional athletes do to ensure premium performance. Really looking forward to the playoffs this weekend to see which of these pointers work out for Allen and the Bills.
Home 