NBA All-Star Sunday is our focus this week. We recap an enjoyable Sunday night, event by event, in this week’s SSM.
The premiere event in our basketball binge Was the Taco Bell sponsored Skills Challenge A long shot winner, Domantas Sabonis Dribbling, passing, shooting, guy could not miss
Next event up, the three point contest From behind the arc, let’s see who’s best Trey’s were falling, it was a tree point flurry An obvious winner here, the man, Steph Curry
The dunk contest was the halftime show We had Obi Toppin and two names you won’t know It was Anfernee Simons of Blazers fame Who won the contest, and cemented his name
Now the main event, Team Lebron vs. KD Alley oops, no defense, and plenty of three’s A glorified scrimmage, but it’s always fun 170-150 was the score, Team Lebron won
Another ASG in the books, a way different look Great job by the NBA, and all who partook A normal All-Star weekend next year, fingers crossed Without events like this, sports fans would be lost
Our long, national nightmare is over folks. On Tuesday, JJ Watt ended his 18 day free agency by announcing that he’s signed with the Arizona Cardinals.
Most reports had Watt’s list of potential next destinations as some kind of combination between the Packers, Bills, Browns, and Steelers. Welp, like this blog, most media is dumb and/or wrong.
JJ told everyone in his home state of Wisconsin, the table-breaking mafia in Buffalo, the Dawg Pound in Cleveland, and his two brothers who play in Pittsburgh to suck it. A total heartbreaker for all involved, besides those in Glendale, of course.
The Cardinals are definitely building, of course with Kyler Murray and former/new Watt teammate DeAndre Hopkins on the offensive side. Watt joins a middle of the pack(ish) defense lead by first team All-Pro Budda Baker and an aging Patrick Peterson. The 2020 Cardinals defense ranked 12th in points allowed, but 22nd in rushing yards, a number that should hopefully improve with Watt joining the defensive line.
So the move is now official. H-Town to the desert, NASA to the Grand Canyon, the rodeo to the Hoover Dam. Much like JJ, I’m looking forward inking a two-year, $31 million dollar contract to round out my career.
We have finally reached the end of a brutal February. What happened in sports during the last week of this snow-filled month? We recap in this week’s SSM.
A single car wreck rocked the golf universe Tiger Woods’ accident luckily could have been worse Today we had a nice tribute after a week full of dread Golfers at the Workday Championship, wearing Sunday Tiger Red
Rooting for a guy who has been through absolute hell Teammates once again with Johnny Manziel Another chapter in the Josh Gordon story A hopeful step to a return to NFL glory
Bryce Harper came to Spring Training with a hot take for all He says the NL East “is the best division in baseball” Top to bottom he may be right, the division is a beast What about the other league? An argument for the AL East?
The Minnesota Timberwolves’ season looking bleak As of this weekend they’re on a seven game losing streak In a long and loss-filled season, someone has to give them shine Unfortunately for the ‘Wolves, plenty more losses down the line
On the other side of the spectrum, the Nets won eight in a row Their last win came on Thursday when they beat up on Orlando But the Mavs came into Brooklyn, and the win streak was no more Dallas took it to Brooklyn, 115-98 was the final score
We’re kicking off a new series; and we’re going by the numbers. This countdown is dedicated to the best players of all-time by each jersey number. No concrete formula here, just career stats, impact on the game, and some good old fashion opinion. Let’s hop right in.
He’s called “The Great One” for a reason. Hard to pick a favorite stat to demonstrate Gretzky’s dominance, but one of my favorites is that if he never scored a goal, he still would have had 11 straight 100-point seasons and won four scoring titles.
Honorable Mentions: Manny Ramirez, George Mikan, Warren Sapp
Not a widely popular number, so not our largest name on the list. Appropriately nicknamed “Big Snacks,” Hampton made five Pro Bowls as the Steelers nose tackle in the early aughts.
Anyone who goes undrafted in their respective sport and go on to become a Hall of Famer is good enough for this list. Randle made seven Pro Bowls and was a six time first team All-Pro selection en route to Canton.
“The Minister of Defense” was one of the greatest free agent signings of all time, when he left the Philadelphia Eagles in 1992 and signed with the Green Bay Packers. He finished his career with 198 sacks, two NFL defensive player of the year awards, and a Super Bowl ring.
Honorable Mentions: DeShawn Stevenson, Gabriel Landeskog
An obvious answer for a surprisingly strong number. But Rodman’s five rings, seven NBA All-Defensive first selections, and nearly 12,000 career rebounds puts him on our list.
Suh has had a late-career number change to 93, but he donned 90 early in his career for the Lions when he was arguable at his best. During his time rocking the big 9-0, Suh was the NFL Rookie of the Year, made four Pro Bowls, and was a three time NFL First Team All-Pro.
Honorable Mention: Ryan O’Reilly
High numbers, a lot of hockey players and defensive lineman, to be expected. Will we have some different sports and positions represented in our next set of jersey numbers, 89-80? Only time will tell.
The week in sports has come and gone. We recap in this week’s SSM.
The best sports news of the week, Spring Training! Baseball is back, and winter is waning A new season has fans excited to their core Unless you’re a fan rooting for Baltimore
Russell Westbrook causing the NBA trouble Four games this week, and three triple doubles He’s lead the Wizards to four straight dubs Not bad for a team who were supposed to be scrubs
Terrible news in baseball, a major blow The official retirement of Tim Tebow Have to give the man credit, gave a tough sport a try But after four years, he’s letting a sleeping dog lie
Carson Wentz, once thought of as the savior of the Philadelphia Eagles, has been traded to the Indianapolis Colts. The trade is just another in a juicy offseason full of flavorful moves rarely seen in the NFL.
Wentz rose to prominence as the quarterback of the NDSU Bison in college, a perennial FCS powerhouse. He shot up the draft boards and became the second overall pick in the 2016 NFL Draft, right behind Jared Goff, who was also traded this offseason for Matthew Stafford.
Wentz has always been a real meat and potatoes guy, a hunter through and through. The gamey quarterback seemed to be the perfect garnish on top of the Eagles organization in his first two years, throwing for nearly 50 touchdowns, and being named a second-team All-Pro in 2017.
After that, it seemed like NFL defenses cured their Wentz issue, and the quarterback was cooked. Opposing defensive coordinators started peppering Wentz with different looks and schemes, and he got smoked.
In the last three seasons, he only won 17 games. His completion percentage became more and more thinly-sliced each year; going from a career-high 69.6% in 11 games in 2018, to a career-worst 57.4% in 12 games last season.
How a career that started off with so much sizzle has dried up so quickly is hard to fathom. It appeared Wentz was braised with all of the physical and mental skills needed to be a top-flight quarterback. The way he has butchered his on field performance the past few years has been wildly surprising.
A fresh start with a new organization may be just what he needs to get lean on the bad play, find some organic success, and become that prime quarterback he was his first few years in the NFL.
Baltimore Orioles fans, if there are any of you left…look away.
FanGraphs, who describes themselves as “[y]our home for advanced baseball analysis and stats” released their projections for all 30 MLB team’s chances at making the playoffs in 2021:
.@fangraphs has announced their projected postseason odds. 👀
Seems fairly benign, right? A few surprises here and there, but check out that last line item on the AL East projections…
Nothing? Not a single chance in the entire world that the Baltimore Orioles make a miracle run to the postseason? Even the Colorado Rockies, who traded away their best player this offseason and share a division with the defending World Series champion Dodgers and most exciting team in baseball in the San Diego Padres, have a 0.1% chance of making it. Zero chance?! Literally absolutely impossible, according to FanGraphs.
The beginning of baseball season is always a great feeling. The weather is warming up around the country, spring training is done, and it’s time to get to the games that count. Hope springs eternal that this year might be the year your team hoists the World Series Trophy. For FanGraphs to just cut the legs out from the baseball community in Baltimore before the season even starts is just brutal. Scientifically proven, but just brutal.
I hope Chris Davis, Trey Mancini, and the other 37 Orioles on the 40-man roster who I’ve never heard of take this disrespect and shove it in FanGraphs face. Use this as motivation to outperform those pesky analytics, show everyone in baseball what you’re truly capable of, and exceed all expectations by losing less than 120 games next season.
Happy Valentines Day! A holiday associated with poetry is a perfect time to drop this week’s SSM.
The Tampa Bay Bucs had their Super Bowl parade Appeared the entire team was drinking vodka lemonade The visuals from the entire day were just so great Who says no to next year Brady getting number eight?
The Houston Texans have released JJ Watt An organization in flux, change happening a lot A formerly great offense, and that defense was mean Next year looks like it’s trending towards 0-16
The Cubs and Jake Arrieta are running it back The Cy Young winner, rejoining the pack In a rotation that’s lacking, Jake could be a guide And stabilize a weakness next year on the North Side
We got old school Melo this week, absolutely silly Sixteen fourth quarter points in a win against Philly Carmelo had 24 points as the Blazers sixth man Portland fifth in the West, things going to plan
It’s 2001, you come home from school and throw some pizza rolls in the microwave. Homework? Nah. Shut the door to your room and throw Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater in the PS2. Are you going with Bucky Lasek, Bob Burnquist, or Chad Muska? Doesn’t matter, all three of them shred so hard.
As great as the THPS soundtrack is, sometimes you have to switch it up a bit. So you grab that trapper keeper that held all of your CDs, and find Blink 182’s classic album Take Off Your Pants and Jacket. You meander through the first few songs, until you get to the third track, “First Date.”
All is good in the world.
Music Video
There is so much going on in this music video and I absolutely love the chaos. A totally random and unexplained anecdote of Tom DeLonge kissing his brother starts the video off right before Travis Barker begins the musical proceedings.
If the costumes and grainy footage didn’t give it away, we quickly learn the setting for the video is El Segundo, California in 1974. Shaggy hair, handlebar mustaches, and short shorts all around. We see the band start to roll around town in their Volkswagen van, exiting accompanied by a plume of smoke, and driving with an “Ass, Gas, of Grass” bumper sticker on the back fender.
Around the 1:45 mark, we get to, in my humble option, the climax of the video…the wiffle ball scene. Both hilarious and sad, the wiffle ball bat gets launched, and caught in the poor girl with the headgear’s bike spokes. She takes a mighty tumble over the handlebars and rolls away crying and ashamed. Sad indeed.
The hilarious part is that this moment produced what is one of the most popular GIFs used today:
At their peak, the guys from Blink 182 were such visionaries they were creating visual art that would become one of the best GIFs we have, 15 years before the medium even became a popular form of communication. Truly forward-thinking stuff.
The remainder of the video is a trip to the water park and go-kart track, where we get some awkward ass slapping, shrinkage jokes, and peeing on the side of the go-kart track. We finish off by getting an update on where the guys are know; Travis drives go-karts full time, Spaulding (Mark) still lives in his van, and Boomer (Tom) is currently in prison for undisclosed reasons. A fitting end to this group of dimwits we’re introduced to in this video.
Best Lyric
I dread the thought of our very first kiss A target that I’m probably gonna miss
Not only are these great lyrics, they’re totally savvy. Blink knew exactly what they were doing here. They had the early aughts, punk rock, teen angst crowd wrapped around their finger. You just know there were millions of 13-17 year olds who felt these lines in their bones.
Another thing that I love about Blink 182 and bands of the like, is the punk rock accent they threw out there when singing, have you ever noticed that? A lot of elongated A’s and ending words with an “auuuugghhh” sound. You can read the lyrics above in what would be considered a normal voice, but they actually sound like:
I draaad the thoight auhv our vaary feeurst keeis A taurgut thaaat owime praubly geeonna meeis
You know I’m right.
Worst Lyric
Is it cool if I hold your hand? Is it wrong if I think it’s lame to dance?
A few pros and cons here. Asking permission to hold someone’s hand, definite pro. Thinking it’s lame to dance, definite con. Starting the song off with a shaky lyric; con. Having the song only get better after said start, pro.
Just because I love it so much, let’s get phonetic and read how these lyrics actually sound coming from Tom DeLonge:
Ees eiut kewl eif I hold yer haaaund? Ees eiut wraung eif I theenk eiut’s lame tuh daaaunce?
You know I’m right.
Rating
It’s a shame that Blink 182 has gone through their fair share of break ups, reunions, and re-break ups. The band currently still consists of Mark Hoppus and Travis Barker. Tom DeLonge has gone his separate way, and has gotten really into aliens, which I’m all for. But I think we would all be glad to see the three members that made up the band at their peak get back together at some point. A great band, and one of their top songs.
Super Bowl Sunday, what a rollercoaster. The excitement of the biggest game of the year and just like that…the season’s over. We take it quarter by quarter in this week’s SSM.
Bit of a slow first quarter, 7-3 Big play was the first Brady to Gronk TD Would the early deficit have the Chiefs feeling blue? Let’s move our recap on, to quarter number two
Second quarter, guess who? Brady to Gronk, TD number two! Bucs looked good and were rolling at half Brady beating Mahomes, the old bull vs. the young calf
Third quarter, more Bucs, Tampa kept adding on Bucs looking like kings, Chiefs looking like pawns Fournette got in on the touchdown party Bucs showed up on time, Chiefs showed up tardy
We all saw it coming from the jump Tom Brady and the Bucs get over the hump Another incredible chapter in the Tom Brady story For the seventh time, TB12 hoists the Lombardi Trophy
Home 